Nj Dyfs

No I havent gone through this yet but I am considering moving to Jersey (I live in Philadelphia) both for work and so I can consider what you guys are doing. I'd like to hear about your experience. Please email me at: staygold914@aol.com

A couple of years ago we were involved with DYFS on their foster/adopt program, we are residents of PA. They had contacted us through friends of ours about an 8 yr old., who actually was 10. Please make sure you are told EVERYTHING about their backgrounds and why they are in the system. This precious little girl was a victim of sexual abuse since the age of 4, they did not disclose this to us. I cannot tell you the horrors this child went through at the hands of her step family but I can tell you a victim of abuse acts out. We were devasted in not knowing how to help her and when my dh went down to their office and would not leave until someone spoke to him directly after 4 hours a SW came out, they spoke and when my dh told her how this child was acting out this woman had the nerve to say "oh that is normal behavior" I don't think so...... at 10 I was playing with Barbie dolls not playing one of the dogs in a sexual nature. The time frame was not long at all especially since we had found out they pushed it through faster because she had to be removed from her precious foster home. At that point we had to relinquish her back as we were not equipped to handle a child with that severe of emotional problems and they offered no assistance. She is and has been with a great family and hasb een getting the help she desperately needs. Make sure all info is disclosed. Jennifer

saleschick hi we have adopted three through nj dyfs and in process of fourth. experiences are different depending on case worker. in regards to time frame it seems everything takes three yrs although seems to be speeding up. i would say nothing concrete happens in the way of permanency until after a yr.. we are also fostering two, brother and sister which seems to be heading towards adoption. but you never know how people come out of the woodwork. email me if you like at maejodj5@optonline.net

We have been through the homestudy and received our approval and have been on the waiting list for several months for a white girl between 2 and 10. No luck yet - not even a call with a child yet. My friend on the other hand was more flexible in a childs race and she got one little boy right from the hospital and adopted him approximately two years later. She now has a little girl who is 6 months old and the adoption is in process.

Saleschick, My husband and I have adopted two children and are currently waiting for a phone call for our 3rd child. As for the waiting times, so much factors in. In the begining, just for us to be approved the process total took about a year. A year after that we got our daughter. Her adoption took another year to finalise. With our son, we only had to up date our paperwork and we had him home with in 2 months but took a year and a half to finalise. It has now been about two and a half months and we are still waiting to hear about a third child. Basically the time frame depends on what type of child you are willing to accept, how many children are currently available that fit into what you will accept. After getting a child soooo much depends on your cw and the childs legal statis. The best advice I can give you is, ask questions. I found that most answers actually came from talking to my cw superviser. As for right now, patience. I will be praying for you as well as myself in that area but all happens in Gods timing. Good Luck

Hi, My dh and I are in the process of adoption through the DYFS system. Last July we had two beautiful girls placed with us, ages 5 & 7. We had to be foster parents first. Our girls are bi racial AA/Hispanic. Our homestudy was started in August of 2004. It was approved March of 2005. And they called us about the girl's end of May 2005. You have to be aware of what you can handle but I know it will most likely happen quicker if you have less requirements. A few things I do that helped us is that I met the foster parents they were living with. They happen to know the girl's all of their lives so I was able to get the info they knew alone with what DYFS told us. You have to remember DYFS' goal is to have these children adopted. Though I have to say they didn't leave out too much that I know of, anyway. One thing that upset us a little is being they had been in 7 homes things just got let go re: medical & educational. But we have accomplished a great deal in 7 1/2 months. The judge states finalization will happen before April 27th and we couldn't be happier. And that's another thing for everyone dealing with DYFS make sure you attend the court sessions about children you are trying to adopt, it gives you updated information that you might never know if you do not. Good Luck Saleschick! Tisa

Tisa, Since my original post was 2 years ago, alot has happened. We did get our 3rd child, a 2 yr old little girl. Her adoption has been finalised and she has been with us for over a year. We do keep in touch w/foster parents for both her and our son. Our oldest daughters foster mom did not want to keep in touch. We did not do any foster care but went for streight adoption. I'm really glad to hear about your two preciouse little girls. Congradulations and best wishes for a speedy adoption. Lorrie :wings:

DYFS is in an enormous state of flux right now. Be prepared for that and be prepared for uncertainty and waiting. Build up a reserve of patience now. It is possible to adopt through DYFS but not easy, especially with all the changes the agency is undergoing recently. I have been a licensed foster mother since September 2005 and have been offered exactly one child who was legally free for adoption in all that time. And the child had a lot of medical problems. However, I have been offered dozens of foster children. Most of the children who are adopted are adopted by their foster families, so keep that in mind. Most of the available children are African-American and a lot are boys. So keep your mind/heart open. Good luck.

We have adopted five and in process of our sixth child to complete our family. The average time for us from Foster placement to time of adoption was three years. It seems after two years reunification seems unlikely but not definate.

My husband and I were put through the wringer trying to adopt a child from DYFS. We were the "squeeky wheel" after our caseworker and supervisor stumbled through the process. Being "squeeky" resulted in our case being delayed even further and with even more headaches. I would never recommend adopting though DYFS. They treat adoptive parents very very poorly. I imagine the same goes for potential foster care parents. We feel terrible for the kids currently in the system. DYFS screw ups prevent their placement with forever families. Very sad. The county head hasnt even stepped in to mediate. Our hearts break...

I had a wonderful experience with DYFS. I was open to gender and race. I was certified as a fost/adopt home for four days before recieving the call for my son. He was a healthy newborn waiting to be brought home from the hospital. After I had him for a year I brought home his newborn sister. Both were healthy (drug exposed in the womb but tested negative at birth, great APGARS) and I was in Heaven. I had three different SW's all of whom were good. I LOVED two of them. I still talk to one of them to this day and it has been five years since I brought my son home. I adopted both of my kids when they were a little over a year old. I felt like my SW's cared about me and my kids. In fact my son's bio sister was in another home with another foster mother and we both wanted the new baby when she was born. Our SW denied picking this new baby up because she liked both of us and didn't want to be the one to decide which of us got the new baby. Luckily I got her and she is my pride and joy. I would adopt through DYFS again in a heartbeat. I would say that your SW probably makes the difference in how you are treated. I think it's hard for those people who want the free for adoption children only. Most foster parents get the first chance at adopting a child.

Thanks for the positive words. We wish we had had similar experiences. Definitely the SW makes an enormous difference. We originally sought adoption only and learned fost/adopt would be most successful and went that route. At this point adopting through DYFS doesnt seem like an option for us. Being treated irrationally doesnt work for us.