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My son is in the Military. He married a young girl last April. They are expecting a baby the 18th of this month. All through this pregancy she has told my son that she doesn't want the baby. Needless to say they are seperated. My son is in Afghanistan, and is very concerned about his baby. He has given his Dad and I his power of attorney. His wife would like us to come and get the baby as soon as he is born. I explained to her that we wanted her to give us full custody of the baby. My son has also stated in a written letter that he wishes for the baby to be with us. She has told us that she would talk to JAG and get the paper work signed giving us full custody. I haven't received any paper work as of yet and the time is very near for the baby's arrival. I'm not sure what the process would be, or who I can contact to make sure that I have full custody before I travel to get my grandchild. I don't want to have any surprises when I get there! I know that the military uses JAG for their legal help. Would I be able to get help from them also? I'm just not sure what my rights are, or if I even have any. Any help concerning this matter is greatly appreciated.
Thanks,
Barbara
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When this child is born, your son will need to add them to his list of dependents on his 'page 13' - he'll know what that term is.
He'll also need to add the child to his DEERS eligibility - something his PSD will do. All he'll need is the child's birth certificate.
As far as care, he'll want to file in court for sole custody based on abandoment. After that while he's deployed you'll want to be named legal guardians for this child once born so that you can authorize medical care, etc. Your son will continue to receive BAH/VHA with dependents regardless of his divorce status because of his child. Once he is divorced from her, the child will need their own military ID to access benefits.
My best advice since he is deployed is to get in touch with the command chaplain, they can be of immense aid in resolving paperwork issues. As to the JAG, they generally are not able to assist with 'domestic' issues such as custody and guardianship. He or his command ombudsman/family contact can advise you on how to get in touch with the command.
You'll want to find a good family lawyer (check with the American Academy of Family Attorneys - Google it and interview at least three) in the state where he maintains residency to file court papers for custody and guardianship. You'll want one with experience in handling military issues. He'll need to show the court that he has a plan as a single parent to provide care while he's away on deployment as well as when he's at work while home. It can and does happen.
No matter what, this child cannot be placed in an adoptive home without his consent.
Best of luck,
Regina, Amom to Ryan Joshua Thomas