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We did decide to adopt the boy & girl . They came to live with us just a week ago. I will say its been trying-- but there is hope. We've learned alot about the kids. They can be redirected. They will look you in the eye (but often must be prompted to do so.) They actively seek positive attention from us and family members. We are in the process of getting a 4-day evaluation to ascertain exactly their diagnosis - and the hope of removing this fist load of meds they are on (on without any diagnosis to warrant such psyc meds). The other kids spazed at first because these children were so undisciplined and our family isn't used to screaming/ fighting etc. So we worked out a plan (with the other three kids) where we all don't allow the two children to divide and conquer, and we actually had one whole evening with peace and everyone getting along. Both kids have a way of making you love them even when you are angry at their behavior.
Still don't know their entire histories - yes I realize we should, but we had heard so much from several sw's that we didn't feel we were being decieved about their conditions. Mostly I think no one knows for real about their conditions (if any) and won't until this evaluation is complete. I really want you all to know -especially Dr Art how grateful I am for your help. The advice on the meds were dead on accurrate. And I was able to take what I learned here and demand evaluations and some serious looks into why they are on psyc meds without reason. Even the school psycologist and teachers are backing me up. Thanks very much. We have agreed to take it one day (and sometimes hour) at a time, be consistant & laugh as much as possible inorder to try and make this work. I just feel in my gut that its possible.