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Robin,
I believe you said former social worker what is up with that???
Why is she suggesting you go to Gua. that could take up to a year, or does she think that would be shorter? I believe you stated your hubby is Panamanian, is that why you have such a strong interest in that country? Let me ask you some questions, Are you willing to wait a year or more to get a child, or wait that amount of time and get no child because to much is going on with all the politics of it? If you are than stick it out, they can't make you leave unless you want to or they shut down in that country. If you said no, than move on to a different country, time and money may even itself out when you look deep into the situation. I was just wondering how you felt about the situation and what you where told. We are not from Panama, and chose it for the culture and we knew it is a country we could easily take our child back to so their culture could be truly shared with them. We have a referral and a picture we fell in love with so getting out would be a decision I could not make unless someone told me I had to, or heaven forbid we couldn't get our son. If we didn't have the referral I would strongly consider it, I know you may think that is terrible, but I have waited several years now for a child, and let me tell you this doesn't make it any easier, and when I think of all the countries we looked into and said no because of the long timelines, and now I am waiting longer than I EVER dreamed possible. I don't, I just think there are ALOT of countries with children in orphanages and they all need a family. This is all getting really hard, the unknowns and "black holes" are getting really really hard to tolerate and understand. I am a person that is frustrated, confused, and frankly sickened at times by the roller coaster of adoption that isn't appropriate or needed. I am going to stop right here and right now before I say something I shouldnt. Robin the point is, IF you feel Panama is the only way to go, than who gives a dime what your caseworker siad, IF you are worried or have concerns than you best be doing some calling to your agency, I suggest the director, I think that would be a place answers can be found right away. I am sure all your questions can be answered there. And when you get those answers share them with the rest of us, we all need some light:)
Thoughts and prayers to bring our babies home soon,
Tanya
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Tanya,
Do you have any updates on when you can travel and get your son, you have had your referral for a long time! We were initially told July or Aug when we got our referral in March but since that's only a few weeks away I don't think that will happen...I'm just hoping for the end of the summer! I hope that's not unrealistic.
Julie
Hang in there!
I believe the unknowns/miss information with Panama are the most difficult for all of us. We were told about all the unknowns going into the process, so I really have no right to complain. I even felt like I was prepared for them. Now, I know that nothing can prepare you for this process except experience with it. I am not saying that because it is Panama. Adoption as a hold takes a tremendous amount of faith, patience, endurance, and love.
I am counting on the fact that once the process is over and my son is home, I will forget how stressful the process was.
Just an update on our situation: TPR was held 6/9 and we are still waiting for the final court date.
Keep the faith, push the patience, build the endurance and hold on to the love!!!!
:)
Wow, Lauri, you're so right!
And just as an example of how things can be looking really bad and then suddenly the clouds clear and you catch a glimpse of the sun:
Today we learned that the bmom who is fighting the TPR has not yet done her drug screen (or turned in the results). She was ordered to have this done at the hospital and the results submitted by the hospital at the May 28 TPR hearing.
So this may be a sign of things to come. :) And her time to get her attorney to court runs out next Wednesday, so hopefully we'll have an answer by then about these two little ones we've waited on for a year now. (I kept telling myself that we couldn't give up on them!)
Rebecca
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That is great news. We have been riding this rollercoaster ride for some time. I think we are all due for some good news. (A light at the end of the tunnel.....)
Rebecca, you have been going through the process the longest and have the most first hand information. Just wanted to let you know how much your insight and sharing is appreciated. I am personally impressed with your patience......
Lauri
I appreciate that, Lauri. But we're not as patient as we seem online, at least not lately. Our attorney has "had it up to here" with the judge of these two kids (who is scheduling a FOURTH TPR hearing for this birthmom), and she's telling us not to put all of our eggs in one basket, so to speak.
However, she still doesn't know of any other children who already have TPR, and with the two sibs that she asked the DNA about 2-3 weeks ago, she STILL hasn't gotten an answer.
Near the end of last week, we were ready to call it quits in Panama. We're still going to give our attorney only until the end of the year. Six months seems like plenty of time, except that the TPR for the first two kids has dragged on for 4 months now, so 6 months could be here and gone before we know it. If that should happen, we'll do foster-to-adopt from our state. We can't afford a private adoption agency because we've wasted more than $6,000 now on international, and won't get any of it back (except for the homestudy costs of $600). :(
I know everyone says to stay patient, that there are kids waiting, but a family can only wait for so long (both financially AND emotionally). We started this process TWO YEARS ago, and our wait has nearly come to an end, with or without a child. I HOPE that it's with a child, and soon. But if not, perhaps Panama will learn a lesson---they cannot drag the adoption process on for so long and still expect to find loving homes for their children!!! It isn't fair to the parents, and it CERTAINLY isn't fair to the children.
Thanks for listening, and sorry to be such a drag today. (Got another e-mail from our attorney this morning, but no new news. We're "still waiting for something to happen," whatever that means.)
Rebecca :confused:
Just wanted to wish Carol luck with Guatemala. A few other families have also switched, so you might be able to find them on the Guat board. :) Please come back for a visit now and then and let us know how it's going!
For us, we've decided to give our attorney (and Panama in general) until the end of the year. That's 6 more months, which means 3 after the new admin. comes in.
In the meantime, we're going to become licensed to do fostercare in our state. That way we can have younger children placed with us who we MIGHT be able to adopt eventually. And IF Panama does come through for us, we can feel good about providing a loving home for one or two children in the meantime.
:)
Rebecca
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