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Hi,
I'm copying and posting my response to an adoptee who was searching for birthparents. It should also help you, as a birthmom know what you can do. All the resources that I've listed can be utilized by birthparents. I assume that you did not go through an adoption agency? If you did, they may also have resources that can help you.
I am an adoptee who searched and found my birthparents (with the help of a private investigator). I commend you for searching to find your birthson. Here are my suggestions. Please feel free to reply or private email me if you have other questions. Best wishes on your search.
SUGGESTIONS:
Be sure and register with the Louisiana Adoption Reunion Registry. It is a mutual consent registry meaning if you and one of your biological parents have registered, they will notify you. Their web address is:
[url]http://www.dss.state.la.us/departme...s/Registry.html[/url]
The cost is $25. Despite what their website says, you do NOT have to get a social worker to sign your application unless a match has been made. If that happens, I'm sure someone from VOA will be more than willing to help you.
Also, you can also register with the International Soundex Reunion Registry (ISRR). Their web address is:
[url]http://www.plumsite.com/isrr/[/url]
They are one of the larger more recognized (and free) registries. There are a million other sites, registries, etc. out there. Stay far, far away from those that want to charge you.
Another person that you may want to contact is Kenny Tucker. He is the co-chair of the LA Adoption Advocates and will have some suggestions, advice, and help to offer. He's a really nice guy who will be more than willing to offer advice and tell you about other sites and resources. His email address is:
ktucker@boassoamerica.com
Louisiana Adoption Advocates has a yahoo group list that you should also join and ask questions/advice/etc.
Also, talk with other adoptees who have found their birthfamilies and find out how they did it (like you are doing here). DON'T listen to people who tell you that it can't be done. Listen to those who have done it and learn from them.
Almost lastly-Be prepared for what you may find. As adult adoptees, we all have this great vision that we will find our families and live happily ever after. It doesn't always work that way and you may find someone who wants nothing to do with you or someone who denies you. I don't want to scare you-but you must be emotionally stable and ready to deal with whatever you find. I tell everyone that I talk with-The search was the easy part. It's developing relationships with those that you find---THAT is the challenge.
Lastly, if you exhaust all other resources, don't ever give up hope. It took many times and many failed attempts to finally find my birthfamilies. I was reunited last year after a long search. Good luck and feel free to email me if you have any other questions.
Best wishes.
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