How I found out I was adopted.

(For reference, when I say my Mom, I mean my adopted mother. She is my Momma and always will be.) :) I wanted to share this, because I know it must be something adopted parents wrestle with every day. I know that most adoptees discover that they are adopted as adults, and my case was very different. Because my Mom was afraid that I would find out from a neighbor and be traumatized by it, (as some people are just mean, and what happened was widely known, at least on our street) she told me when I was very young. I don't remember how old I was, so I must have been at least as young as seven or so. First, my Mom and I sat down and read one or two of those kids books, if I recall correctly one was called, "Why am I adopted?" but I could be wrong. Anyway, then my mom said she wanted to know what I thought about something. She said, if she went to the store and bought some ingredients for bread, and her oven was broken, and so she baked the bread in my older sister's oven, well, then who would the bread belong to? I said, well if you paid for the bread, it belongs to you, no matter who made it. Mommy reminded me, how her tummy was always hurting. (Momma had ulcers then, and was often in a lot of pain, and so I was aware that her tummy could be "broken", although I know now, that was just her way of helping me to understand, and that her ulcers were not what prevented her from giving birth.) So, then she carefully explained to me, that I had grown in someone else's tummy, and made it seem kind of like it was a favor to my Mom, and then Mom was the one who took care of me and loved me my whole life. So because my Mom explained this to me at a young age, the fact that I was adopted was something that I simply knew, just like I knew my name, and that my hair was brown and that I was a girl. It wasn't a negative thing at all, I felt all the more loved, and precious, because Mommy always told me, I didn't grow under her heart, I grew in it. I was chosen, I was special! I bragged about it to my teachers and the kids in school, I was proud of the fact that most kids are just born into their families, but not me! Nope, I was way more lucky and special. :cool: So, because my wonderful Mommy always reminded me of how loved I was, and how special to her and my Daddy, I never ever felt bad about it all. Later, when I was old enough to understand, my Mom did explain the harder details about my adoption. But of course, I was too young for that at the time of the telling. So, I hope that this little story helps all of the adopted parents out there who are warm and loving and just want to know when it is best to share this with their adopted children. My advice is, the sooner you tell them, the more likely that they will grow up with understanding and a feeling of confidence and self-worth. We (adoptees) are all SO blessed to have been chosen by caring, wonderful families!! Please, don't wait until your child is an adult, it will only confuse and shock them if you do. My Mommy did it just right, she helped me understand how lucky and how loved I was, by being honest with me and giving me an understanding of things. She did sugar-coat it some of course, but I feel that was the best thing, as when I was old enough she did tell me more. Please, be honest with your kids! They will only love you all the more and appreciate your honesty. I LOVE my Momma for telling me when I was young, I feel that she made just the right decision, and I am so thankful for it. Now, I am ready to search for and make contact with my birth family, because I have known for all of this time and am better prepared for it. So do the right thing folks, and be honest with your children from the beginning! And if you have doubts, just look at how well I turned out! :p