Help with book choices X posted

Sorry, I haven't read any of them...maybe I read "Beyond the Whiteness of Whiteness" years ago but can't really remember it. There is a book about transracial adoption by Barbara Katz Rothman that I have been wanting to read because I really enjoyed her books on pregnancy and childbirth, but I can't recall the title...have you read that one?

I haven't read it but it looks like it needs to be added to my list :) Here's what I found.... Weaving a Family:Untangling Race and Adoption Barbara Katz Rothman, a noted sociologist who has explored motherhood in four previous books and has more recently explored the social implications of the human genome project, now turns her eye toward race and family. Weaving together the sociological, the historical, and the personal, Barbara Katz Rothman looks at the contemporary American family through the lens of race, race through the lens of adoption, and allrace, family, and adoptionחwithin the context of the changing meanings of motherhood. Drawing on her own experience as the white mother of a black child, on historical research on white people raising black children from slavery to contemporary times, and pulling together work on race, adoption, and consumption, she offers us new insights for understanding the way that race and family are shaped in America today. This book is compelling reading, not only for those interested in family and society, but for anyone grappling with the myriad issues around raising a child of a different racean estimated seven million American families in 2005.

Have you read any of these books as yet? I just finished Loving Across the Color Line and I have very mixed feelings about it. While I think the author does bring up some good points, ie: white folks having difficulty understanding how pervasive racism is, I believe that she is somewhat out of touch with parenting in general. It seems like she is looking constantly for examples of racism in her daughter's life, and sees everything in terms of color. She has set herself up to see every case of unfair treatment as a racist incident, and doesn't seem to realize that there are other types of unfair treatment totally unrelated to race. We are a white family who has adopted a black child. I recall an instance where a child in my daughter's school walked up to my daughter and stated "you know why I hate you? Because you have a big nose". Obviously racist, right? Seems like it, but no...this incident occurred in my (white) birth daugter's life, not in the life of my (black) adopted daughter. And does my daughter have a big nose? Actually, it is rather tiny. Is all of life fair? No. Are all instances of unfair treatment a result of racism? Absolutely not. But Rush seems unable to even entertain this possibility. Rush seems determined to perpetuate the racism she says she deplores. By finding examples of racism where racism may not even exist, she perpetuates the idea that persons of color can not be treated like everyone else. They must be singled out as extra special or else it will be perceived as racial discrimination (ie: her daughter not receiving the 'student of the week' award, not being immediately placed in a gifted class, etc.) Rush does raise some good points. It is very difficult for whites to understand what it is like to experience racism, and racism is, unfortunately, a pervasive disease of our society. But her solution - that only by experiencing transforming love of a black person - can racism be overcome is a bit...extreme. Let me know what you thought. I fear that some of the thoughtful things she had to say have escaped me as I was very upset with her apparent need to constantly point out to her daughter how her blackness will negatively affect her all her life.

I did get a chance to read the Katz-Rothman book and I didn't like it as much as I liked her books on pregnancy and childbirth, which I liked a lot. I guess in the adoption book I was looking for more personal material, and she focused a lot on larger societal frameworks. I haven't read Loving Across the Color Line, so I can't say anything about it. I think some folks are too eager to see every slight as being about race, but I also see where that tendency comes from--often from their own experiences. Which, as a white person, it is hard for me to measure the impact of in a person's life. I have had 3 people in my lifetime say derogatory things about my ethnic group (Italians) in front of me because they didn't realize I was one. It didn't make me think that I was consistently being discriminated against because I am Italian, but those incidents didn't take place within a society that has the kind of history with Italians that it does with black people. Maybe if, like my DH, I was black and those 3 comments came AND I lived in a city where all the black kids have the cruddiest schools AND I knew that my parents grew up in a town where they were not allowed in the movie theater or swimming pool or restaurants AND I could point to the tree in that town where two of my paternal great uncles had been lynched, And I had been pulled over twice for no reason just to be asked "where I am going" while driving in rural areas of the state where I pay taxes AND one of my college professors said I had only been let in because of affirmative action even though I was the top student in the program and even before getting my doctorate was published in peer reviewed journals in my academic field AND when I did get my PhD and was hired as a university professor, security constantly stopped me when I was entering the building where my office was because they didn't see a professor (or apparently recognize me from the day/week before) they saw a black man. Now, I don't know if 3 people said mean things to my DH about his being black like they did to me about Italians, but all of those other things are his history. He actually is not one to think every little thing is about racial discrimination, but he is in general a very calm, reasonable person. If I was him, I think I might have a chip on my shoulder by now. After all, I am Italian and you know how hot-headed THEY are. I don't think there is anything positive that will result from teaching our kids that every time things don't go their way, or someone doesn't like them, it is because of racial bias or discrimination. On the other hand, I can see where people who have a lifetime of experiences like my DH can start to be on edge about it.

I agree with the other poster about the book Loving Across the Color Line when she/he wrote: "Rush seems determined to perpetuate the racism she says she deplores. By finding examples of racism where racism may not even exist, she perpetuates the idea that persons of color can not be treated like everyone else. They must be singled out as extra special or else it will be perceived as racial discrimination (ie: her daughter not receiving the 'student of the week' award, not being immediately placed in a gifted class, etc.)" I was almost angry after reading that particular book. I have also read In Their Own Voices and that was a good read. Interesting and worth the time. I would also suggest I'm Chocolate, You're Vanilla if you haven't already read that one. Janet

well, I'm way behind -- I haven't even ordered any yet. Baby got sick right after the holidays and we've also been busy helping another family member struggling with health issues. My brother bought me some interesting books - AA history, not adoption. So I have been trying to read those when I have any free moments. One is quotes of famous African Americans throughout history and I love that one. Another is an encyclopedia of AA heritage. It's huge & I haven't made it thru much of that one yet. I think I'll at least get In Their Own Voices ordered today -- next step is making time to read it ! I'm glad to see input on some of the other books.

I also liked I'm Chocolate, You're Vanilla. I did not like Black Baby, White Hands. I think it's a good story about how adoption USED to be, I think that in the 60's and 70's there may have been a leaning towards raising children to embrace only the adoptive parents culture and heritage but I think that's passe and most adoptive parents now go out of there way to honor their adoptive child's background.

This isn't an adoption book, but it's a cute book about a little African American boy who overcomes his fears to fish in his Grandpa's "yucky" lake. (He even catches a "big" one!) FYI--The author said she wrote the book for her grandson's (the main character) college fund. Cool, huh? :cheer: (P.S. If you buy directly from the publisher, she makes the most. If you buy from Amazon or Borders, she only gets $1. This is good to know in case any of you are planning to write your own story some day.) ;) [url]http://www.authorhouse.com/BookStore/ItemDetail.aspx?bookid=35285[/url]

I just finished In Their Own Voices yesterday and I thought it was a really interesting book. I do have to go back and read thru the research and studies information in the front of the book. I skipped all that & went straight to the interviews. I appreciate books with first hand information. I'm really interested in reading Why Are All The Black Kids Sitting Together In The Cafeteria? I have heard from everyone that has read it that it's a really heavy read. I have read I'm Chocolate, You're Vanilla and I did really like it. DD is 4 and has just recently made comments about our features, hair & color being different. She was aware previously that her dolls were different shades but has only recently begun applying those differences to us - or at least has just begun to articulate that. I have found lots of children's books that feature or include children of all different colors and always like adding more to dd's book collection.

"The Colors of Us" by Karen Katz is a children's book about an artist mom who shows her adopted daughter the many shades of brown (cinnamon, hot cocoa, nutmeg, etc.).

just wanted to mark this thread for someday soon. we have the most beautiful 3 week old baby girl, and if we get gift cards or cash (or when we've saved up more $, lol), i intend to get some more books. thanks!!btw, does anyone know of a book that may have a "how to do" list, ie, have multicultural dolls? i like the idea of books on on AA history as well, becky, which ones do you have and like? any fairs or special dates? i just don't know where to start, but i want to do whatever i can. anyone know where i can get multiethnic scrapbooking stickers? i of course, naively never noticed this before, but it's annoying how much baby stuff is of white babies! not that i dont like them too, but sheeeesh!! we got this little baby book with pictures in it, and out of 50, yes, 50 babies, 10 are different ethnicities than white, 5 are black, and no asian babies (i noticed this b/c dd is 1/2 black, 1/4 asian, 1/4 white). wth?

"A kid like ME" is the brand of AA and Asian (and maybe Hispanic?) stickers made by "Me and My Big Ideas." They are cartoonish stick figures (boys and girls) doing various things (eating birthday cake, riding a bike, hugging friends, etc.). You might also try [url]www.stickerplanet.com[/url].

I'm not sure who publishes it, but I have the Encyclopedia of African American History, also another great one is full of quotes of famous & historical AA figures. Really, I have not had a problem finding books with AA characters. I am in Childrens Book of the Month club & also buy local & from Amazon - they have a ton. They are out there and I have found a lot that have nothing to do with race or adoption, that have characters is quite a variety of hues. Not a lot of luck in some other areas though....I never was able to find black barbie products for dd's birthday.