Stealing food

It sounds to be like this is the "spilled salt" of the situation. There are many other issues that are happening but this is the one that "breaks the camels back". It is frustrating when our foster kids don't listen to us. No matter what their age, if they are defiant, it's hard. You have to find a way to reach him. He's old enough to know that he's not allowed to wander the house at night. So the door alarm is a good idea. If not, perhaps he does need a new home. If it's not working for your family, the placment needs to stop. Being frustrated and angry with him will show through and it will benefit no one. Good luck! Teens are hard!