New to the group....

You gotta not worry about the openness, it's really so great! It is like having a second set of in-laws (imho) The avereage wait I have heard is 1.5 yrs after being listed. We were picked exactly 1.5 yrs after submitting our application and 1 yr after being listed. I know of one couple who was picked 1 day after being listed. and another was chosen BEFORE they even completed the homestudy and wasn't even listed yet! Others I have seen wait 8 years. The openness is great in our adoption. We didn't have contact for the first 6 months (her choice) and I enjoyed a month or so of space, but then I was on pins and needles waiting for it to be ok finally. The best thing to do is right away discuss what minimums you are able to commit to. Then find out what maximums she/they wish to have....then agree to communicate what is and isn't working. We are emailing as we please, but it ends up being about every 2 weeks or so. I know of others' who've simply set up an online blog/journal with photos that family or anyone can visit as they wish. We have not done a visit yet, but it may be coming as her brothers will be moving to WA this fall and most likely driving right past our house. The bmom abandoned her other kids and divorced her hubby, so bmom won't be there, but her step dad and brothers would be. I am excited, hubby is apprehensive and the step-dad doesn't know we are even considering it yet. Bottom line is be committed to whatever you decide and if things change, be open in your communications. I flat out ask bmom stuff like, how long do you want the letters, etc.. And repeatedly tell her if it's too much or not enough to just tell me and I'll adjust, but until I hear otherwise I'll send what I'd send to any other family member. I feel like bmom is like a baby sister/sis in law to me, so I approach her like that. Tigger27 is an LDS bmom, you could talk to her to get a feel for the bmom side of things. Someone here once wrote "To you it's messy strings, to me it's the loving ties that bind" And I think that fits it perfectly. Ask anytime if you have anymore questions!

Hi Hilery. We have a daughter from Guatemala and are contemplating the same thing wondering if we should go through LDS Family Services. We'd like to adopt from Guatemala again but aren't ready to start the process until early 2007. I don't know if it would work out because of the Hague thing.