"how many siblings do you have?"

Now that I am in reunion I tell people I have one brother and three sisters. My brother I grew up with (adopted also) and I just "found" my sisters. I don't go into detail unless someone questions me. At first I would hesitate, but I don't even care anymore. Actually, I do not get along with my brother and rarely talk about him. So, many people think I am an only child.I have always been pretty up front about being adopted so I am ok with talking about it. People ask me questions all the time!

I've been going through the whole sibling thing also. I always said I have 1 sister. She is the daughter of my a-parents. In my mind I have 1 sister.---Well last year things got turned upside down for me. I always knew I had half siblings out there in the world. I've even met 3 of them from my b-fathers side and we don't bother with each other. I only seem to see them at funerals. So I never include refering to them as siblings when somebody asks. Last year I found my half sister and half brother. He still hasn't talked to me. He didn't know about me for 42 years. So he doesn't know how to handle it. I'm waiting. Now my half sister is another story. She's been looking for me. We have a great relationship. She tells everyone I am her sister (nothing half about it to her). I haven't been asks yet how many siblings I have. I don't know what to give as an answer. I feel really stupid. It's like, duh, I don't even know how many brothers or sisters I have.:confused: Ok here's the run down: 1 sister from my a-family----1 half sis and 2 half brothers from my b-father----1 half sis and 1 half bro form my b-mother. Now here it gets fun:rolleyes: --My b-father adopted his wifes (ex-wife now) son---so does he count? Also his last wife had 2 daughters which are his step daughters----do they count? Oh and my b-mother was pregnant when she died---that baby would have been a real full blood sibling. So come on ---someone tell me how many siblings do I really have?:confused: :eek: --------- My half sis and I were off somewhere with my a-mom and Mom told someone I was her daughter and this was my sister. The person assumed we both were her daughters and said something of the nature. My mom just let it slip by cause she said she didn't feel like explaining.----- As of now I feel like I have 1 sister and 1 half sister---but that still calls for explaining since my parents are married for 61 years!!!:eek: Someone help!!!!!

I can so relate to Tanzy's 'blended' family situation. Via my adoptive parents, who'd also ended up remarrying, I have: 1 brother via adoption, 1 stepsister from my a-dad's second marriage, 1 half-sister from my a-dad's second marriage. That's 3. Now that I've met some of my birth siblings, I've learned that I have 4 birth siblings. So I guess officially one could say that I have 7 siblings! The trick question that many adoptees and stepchildren face is, are our siblings the one's we grew up with, the ones from birth and/or the ones gained via stepparents? I guess depending upon how one feels about their relationships, it will vary. Maybe the Brady Bunch will morph into something even more complicated one day! Thanks for both Jan18 and Tanzy's reply. It's comforting to know that others grapple with this common question.

For me I found my bmum and subsequently bdad both of them with assorted children 20 years ago now when I was 15yo. At first once I added up and met all the siblings and family etc, it was very difficult to answer questions about siblings and family.As it was emotionally raw. But now I ve been doing it so long that I just tell people the truth. 'I'm adopted and know my bfamilies, my asiblings are a brother and sister, my bmum has a son, so he's a half brother, and my bdad has 1 daughter and 5 sons.That is my family. Funny thing is there are members of that family who dont acknowledge other members, but Im past caring about that. Because it is MY family, and I acknowledge them all.

I don't get the "step thing" or even half thing.Now my daughter has a brother but is he half? some? a little? how about my sons? half? some? little? I have a "half brother" but, he's my brother. period.If I ever find the one that is "lost" he too will be my brother. I just don't get the distinctions, I supposedmca

My mom is a birthmom who placed my bio-half-sister for adoption. So, I'm the oposite of you guys :) lol If people ask how many sibblings I have, the answer is one. My brother. The baby my mother placed is my biological half sister...but she's not my sister. We're very close, we've known each other all of our lives...but she just doesn't have a sister role in my life. For me, that comes from growing up together. She also, has two brothers (one who past away) and those are who she considers her sibblings.

Very sad thinking about this. I saw the replies. One thing that I wanted more than anything was for my daughter to have a relationship with my sons. Even though we missed out on so much, ( my decision and I take full responsibility and consequences), I was hoping that they would be my children together. I really thought that they could share their children and lives and make a family connection, Silly me. I admit I'm a romantic. So, I see, from the posts, that is just not possible.I suppose I should back off a little at a time now and go on as before.Hard to do, but, at least I know she is alive happy and has a mother and brother.Oh well, you live and learn. I lived through it once with no information and my sons had a life with no sister, so we can do it again.dmca

I agree with this (for me anyway). I'm not an adoptee, so maybe it's different. I told my son he has a brother, not a half brother or biological brother, just a brother. As for me, if you have to be technical I have 3 half brothers and 2 half sisters from fathers 1st marriage, 3 half brothers and 1 half sister from mothers 1st marriage, a full brother that was placed for adoption @ birth, a twin brother, 3 step brothers and 4 step sisters. But to me there is no half, biological or step. I simply have 11 brothers and 7 sisters. They are all my family wether or not we were raised together or met later in life.

well for me......i can relate to what you said in the first place ripple about being mixed race or bi-racial, or transracially placed..or just mixed...whatever terminology sits comfortable with people.....and i think...i need to practice how to answer peoples questions and need to ahve some one liners, or a bit more dependin gon the situation and who it is that is aksing. After all...no...we dont ahve tot ell everyone, everything. Just ebcasue we start to get more info about ourselves and family, whereas maybe before we couldnt answer people....we still have the choice now, evern though we know more. Well thats the way i see it, as i battle with this all the time...how much to say, and to whom, and waht to say.....Its personal, private and this..let everything hang out....isnt always helpful...... as for siblings...well I got some.....I got me some foster brothers...whom i grew up with..they are part of my history, and part of my life...then I got me a foster sister.....shes also part of my histroy and growin gup...they are just rbothers and sisters......and then I got me one sister on my bmothrs side......and now i hear I have two others on my bfathers side.......so when people say do you have siblings, i just say yes, 4 i grew up with, and three I did not...hey they are all part of me...whether i grew with them or not. or they with me......now how i feel about it....well thts a different issue........ shef

I agree with dmca. My sisters are "my sisters". We only share a mother, but I never say 1/2 sisters. I guess I just never thought about it in terms of being half related.I am just excited that I have three "little sisters"! I just wish they didn't live so far away!

LOL... I'm just the opposite... I was the one born to my parents.. and I had 10 brothes and one sister. I do state that I have that many siblings, but, when I feel up to blowing someones mind away... I just tell them I am an only child with 10 brothers and one sister.. lol..