A shoulder to cry on

Hi everyone, Firstly after reading some of your stories i feel better already. just knowing im not the only one in need of advice. i'm 21 and live and work in Paris with my boyfriend. We recently found out im 10weeks pregnant. It was shocking for us as the pregnancy was unplanned. At first I took the news in my stride. I told my mum as fortunately she was visiting the next day, and talked through my options calmly and openly with my boyfriend and we decided were not ready for a baby and abortion would be the best and fairest option for us. However, since then things have crumbled down on me. My mum, who at first appeared to be simply supporting My decision has got it into her head that im keeping the baby and has been making uncomfortable comments like 'this is the best buggie' 'take these iron tablets' 'what names do u like?' the list is endless. Im suffering from terrible nausea all day long and am pushing my boyfriend away, infact his smell strangely triggers my sickness and i cant bare to be near him. At work i had some racial abuse which my company chose to ignore, and as im a strong person so did i but im guessing due to my hormone changes its the reason i cant face work or those bullies. I have to face children at work as part of my job and don't want to put my mood on them. but, at the same time im starting to feel very depressed and like a couch potato by not going. im normally a very active happy girl. i dont want to see my friends or go out full stop! finally, and probably worst of all, the doctors here in france are very unsupportive and judgemental. i just had an appointment with one and left crying. the receptionist also refused to let me talk to a different general doctor after demanding infront of a room full of patients why i needed too saying i didnt need time off work as pregnancy is not an illness.i felt so alone and embarrassed. i just needed to talk, maybe be i am over reacting but its just how i feel, i cant help it. appart from my boyfriend i dont have anyone else here to talk too and i push him away anyway. Phew! feeling lighter now ive opened up. please, if u feel u can help, id really really appreciate it. Even if its just say pull yourself together, things aren't so bad. Lauren xx