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So DH and I seem to have these "battles" lately....we have an open adoption with our DD's birth family. But it is NOT that open in the sense that under our agreement we provide quarterly letters and pics and have a yearly visit. I also talk to DD's mom very occasionally by phone. I personally think we have the BEST birth family for our DD and would like to have more contact than under the OA agreement. DH thinks that there is too much contact as is -- he really likes the birth family, but he thinks that the contact we have is somehow "intrusive" in our family. (DH btw is an adoptee from a closed situation and thinks that is "best."). It has caused some stress for us because he cannot see things my way and I really can't see things his way. I know we need to work this out in a positive way.....Has anyone had similar struggles/can offer advice? TIA. PS: I just wanted to add that my DH is a really, really nice person (I am making him sound like an ogre, I realized!!). Also, in fairness, we had a much more limited "OA" agreement that we had signed and after a few days of having DD home, birth mom asked for many more updates and the yearly visit. So I guess the ground "shifted" for us a bit.
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