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Its me again..still hanging in there. In a few weeks our court hearing will be coming. I do have some questions if anyone might know. We are the ones in the contested adoption now going on almost 2 years. What happens if the birth father does not show at the court hearing? Will we still have to find him? Can a judge terminate his rights? We know the court notices have been sent out, we believe the birth father no longer lives in our state. I was wondering if this will hopefully be the end...and we can move forward with the adoption. The birth father knows the adoption is pending..so if he moves and does not contact the courts -Isn't that on him? I cannot see a judge allowing this to go on much longer. Please if anyone may have some insight into this..we would be so thankful. We are keeping busy with Easter coming, and just enjoying and loving our angel!! Trying desperately to keep our minds on our angel and away from what might happen. I just pray to God this will not be dragged on, I cannot imagine us having to locate him once again. Nobody knows his whereabouts...and he knows of the pending adoption. I don't see what more we can do. I hope the judge realizes we have done all we can and this needs to end. We are still praying for only the best for our little angel!!
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You never know what a judge will do, of course, but typically, if notice has been properly given and the party doesn't show, a court will find in the other party's favor by default. We had this issue w/ the N.A. tribe in our son's adoption. When they didn't show up to object to the adoption after they were given proper notice, the judge considered that they had waived any rights. If he doesn't show up after proper notice, I'd argue that it's in the best interests of the child (and that's what controls here) to finalize this matter. Good luck---hope it goes well.
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That was the situation with my adoption of my grandson. Neither parent showed up, although they had been told the adoption was proceeding and the legal form was published in the local paper for six weeks. Afterward the father tried to dispute on the grounds that he had not seen the announcement, but the judge said it was published legally and it was bfather's responsibility to know what was happening. The finalization still holds.
Hi StacyKelly2, I do not know, but I have read in numerous posts from others that not shhowing is usually seen as a default win for you. In my case we do not know where the birthmom is but her lawyer does - so we communicate through her lawyer. I am assuming his lawyer, or past lawyer, has been notified? Waiting is hard. REAL hard. I know. So I will wait with you and hold your hand and heart in mine and help you get through this the best you can. Please let me know if I can do anything. I do think it is a good thing that this judge is particular about having the case in front of her again. To me that sounds like a very good sign. You know how to reach me - any time friend of mine. Christie:flowergift:
Of course, I have a thousand things going through my mind. I just want to make sure that when we do go to court that everything is set into place. I just don't want anymore hold-ups. I am not sure if the birth father will show or not, hopefully not. The only thing now that goes out is the court notice. I am just wondering if he is no longer at the address he provided to the courts..would we still have to put something in the paper. I thought that was done only when a birth father was unknown. I guess the closer this gets the more I am thinking. I would think that the birth father should be responsible for atleast notifying the courts he knows of the pending adoption. Just trying to get all the information I can...and this forum knows a lot!! I am so thankful for everyones help on here. Thanks again...:flowergift:
StacyKelly2, Your lawyer should know about placing an ad in the paper. IMO and in my experience, everything possible needs to be done to notify the birthfather. As you know in my case we posted in several newspapers as an added precaution. That way he can not come back - yet again - and claim he did not know and still have legal standing. Not that posting ads won't stop that anyway - but just adds a buffer. YES - HE *should be* responsible for doing something - and in your case he has been extremely irresponsible and sporadic about saying one thing, claiming another, changing his mind, showing up, disappearing - it is maddening! And I have no idea why the courts allow them to continue to do this. When does it EVER end? Hopefully, for you - soon! I know you are scared. I am hanging in here with you and "holding your hand" as we both wait and both hope and both pray for our children's sakes. Here for you, Christie
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The ad is also placed when the birthfather is known but his location is not. That was the case with our adoption. Also, the birthmother was known, but her location was not (as she was moving from place to place to avoid an arrest warrant). Even though everyone knew there was NO WAY IN THE WORLD that these bparents were going to read the "legal ads" section of the county paper, the court says that printing the ad six weeks running is all the notice required. They did not show (she was in jail by then and he went into rehab to avoid jail) and we won by default.
I posed your situation to our attorney and this is what she said: As long as he was provided proper notice at his last known address, if he doesn't show or file anything then the court will proceed without him I thought that sounded right but didn't want to say anything until I asked her. Best wishes, honey. Hopefully this will be over very soon. And have a VERY HAPPY EASTER!!