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I totally feel your pain. We are going through the same thing. Our 8 1/2 month foster son is leaving us on Friday. He has been with us since Feb 5 and we are completely heartbroken. We always have a rough time when our foster kids leave but this time we are devastated. Even though we knew from the begining that a family member was working on becoming foster certified so she could take him.
We are writing a letter, too, to put in his life book. Ours says how much we love him, how happy we for him and his family (about the ru), and how we hope to see him again. We are also writing a letter to the family asking them to allow us to stay in contact. We have an email address that we give out to families of former foster kids and I will make sure that it is in both letters.
I haven't completely finished the letter but if you want I'd be happy to pm you a rough draft! Just let me know.