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We are in the process of adopting from Ukraine. We have two biological children already and this is our first adoption.
Recently my husband expressed a concern that we will feel differently about our adopted vs. biological children. He is worried that we will always think of our biological children as "our kids" and our adopted children as "our adopted kids," does that make sense? Not that we won't love them - just that we will always differenciate between them.
Is this the case for anyone out there? If so, do you feel it is a negative aspect of having both bio. and adopted children? We are not having second thoughts about the adoption, but you can never know what it will be like afterwards until, well, afterwards.
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ashleyca, My dh wondered about feeling just as close to our youngest son(adopted) the same as he does to our (oldest). We didn't talk about it much because I remembered that when I was pregnant it was not reality for him until he actually held the baby. Then reality sets in and the bonding and love began. So I was confident that the same thing would happen for our youngest son. The day that we met our youngest son dh was in love. I have to admit it took me alittle longer to adjust which surprised me. Other than to say one is bio the other is adopted is only for this forum. In the real world they are our children. I have never thought about one being something more or less than the other child. They simply are our children....it does not matter how we became a family. My story is a great one but there are sometimes other families that don't do as well or the bonding process takes longer. Don't let this discourage you either. Each family and child and situation is different. Take each day one day at a time. Good luck and keep us posted.
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