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Let me preface this by saying I am a FIRST time Mom and probably not a very good one! :-) My DD is adopted from Guatemala and 3 y.o.( she has been with me since 13 weeks old). She is a happy, friendly and very active child that is a little on the rough side. She has no concept of "space" or "time". What I mean by this is / example. This past weekend we went to McD's for her to eat lunch and play. She was the only child in the play area and she did play but was so excited when a little girl came in that was approx 5 y.o. that she ran to her and hugged her and held her around the waist while the little girl tried to remove her shoes. ( not a child either of us knew). Once they started playing together they did enjoy each other's company BUT she needed time and space when she first came in the area. They call DD the "greeter" @ daycare because she runs to hug and greet children and parents as they come in the class. She normally even climbs up in the arms of the parent for a morning hug. ( I know this is SWEET BUT -- this is also the time the parent is trying to say good bye to their own child and deal with the daily separation.) I am constantly having to talk to her about giving another child "space" and I overheard the teacher as I was leaving this AM telling DD to give the child some "time" to warm up to the morning. Is my DD too young @ 3 to get this concept. Is it something that can be taught? Is it something that comes with age? Even as her mother who loves her beyond anything and wants her hugs and kisses-- sometimes I need a little more space!! I can't sit on the couch to watch TV w/ her w/o her being in my lap or glued to me. She still constantly wants to be carried and I do sometimes but she is beginning to get heavy!( horrible MOM! I KNOW!) Please understand her qualities are GOOD qualities and I am blessed to have such an amazing child that is so happy, easy, and loving AND I DON"T WANT TO CHANGE HER personality in any way BUT!!! how do you teach "space"???
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First of all, you sound like an amazing mom. Second of all, I really think some kids are just more "touchy feely" than others (though I agree, people like their space!!!). I think as she gets older, she will just pick up more on social "cues." I will say DD loves to hug, AKA manhandle other, especially smaller children, but she never wants to sit with me anymore (sob!). I know there are books, like "teeth are not for biting" (my DD was a biter! ouch!)...I wonder if there is a book teaching "space" stuff? GOOD LUCK!
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[FONT=Comic Sans MS]You may want to have her evaluated for sensory processing issues. Her behaviors are VERY similiar to some of my DS's sensory issues and age 3 is a very common age for these issues to become obvious in kids...it is very easy to compensate and keep the issues hidden in younger kids. There are some threads in the Russian forum on sensory issues and I just posted a great article there today. [/FONT][FONT=Comic Sans MS]My DS is a sensory seeker, among other sensory issues...he bangs, crashers, climbs, appears fearless...he hugs too tightly, stands too closely to other kids...he pushes and struggles to keep his hands to himslef when he is excited or over stimulated. Many kids do these things but once they begin to interfere in 'normal' life...that is when they become a problem. DS's 'special needs' teacher says she can see that DS NEVER means to do it...and he is now beginning to recognize what he did as soon as he does it...a step in the right direction. [/FONT][FONT=Comic Sans MS]At age 3 you shouild be able to have her evaluated by your school district...we are lucky to have a great school district which acknowledges sensory issues. [/FONT][FONT=Comic Sans MS]Good luck. [/FONT]