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Long story short.... When DD turned 18 I found out who she is and found tons of info on her and her family. (It was a closed adoption) I sent an email to the Agency asking if DD was ready for contact shortly after her 18th birthday. Her dad replied back saying she wasn't. So I respected that and quietly gathered pics and info. I created a myspace under my maiden name so she was able to privately get to know me. Last Fall her "Beau" requested to be my friend on myspace so he could read my blogs. Important note: turns out I have always lived within 20 miles of DD, she even attended school in the same district I grew up in. I started a new job recently. I was talking to a co-worker...turns out her daughter went to school with DD, they even graduated together. Co-Worker was just as excited as me. Her first response was "She looks just like you and has your build!" She ran home and picked up her daughter's yearbooks...it was bittersweet, but I loved seeing the pictures. The Co-Worker said DD was always VERY open about being adopted and she always thought that was odd because DD looks like she belongs in her family. She said if she stuck out like a sore thumb it would make sense, but she didn't. Needless to say, my head is spinning. DD's profile on a online community only has a few things open to the public. The pics were always private...until last Sunday night. She has two of the "albums" open. Monday night she went in and added a couple more pictures of her and her boyfriend and her and her best friend. The co-workers daughter isn't close to DD so I know she won't say anything, but there was another girl there at the co-workers house who is close to DD. She heard about me and the resemblance and she was asking about our personalities (apparently DD has my personality). There is a possibilty this other might have said something, but I don't know. Does DD want to eventually meet me? Is this why she was so open about being adopted? Why would she now make a couple of albums public? Should I send another message to the agency? I am climbing the walls...I don't know what to do!!! How do I let her know it's okay to email me without scaring her by sending her a message through her profile???? DD is almost 20, is she getting close to being ready??? Am I reading too much into this???
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It sounds to me like she's sending out an invitation of sorts. Her boyfriend clearly knows about you and I bet she's reading your blogs. She's reaching out in a way that makes sense to her. I'd send a short email of intrduction to her. My youngest parented daughter is 20years old as well. They reach out very subtlety.
Congratulations and good luck! Keep us posted!
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Awe...fear...I get it. I understand it. But imagine that she wants you to get in touch with her...imagine that she's dreaming about it. Fear...It holds us back from achieving our dreams.
Send her a short private message. Take the chance. Take the risk. Ignore your fears. You owe it to YOU.