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I received a phone call 10 days ago from a woman identifing herself as younger half sibling. She had proof. My twin and I are devstated to learn at our age,68, that are parents arent our birth parent. We were only children. Everyone dead we can talk to. We had wonderful,loving, kind and generous parents who loved us until the day they died. I consider myself blessed to start from a birth mother in Tyler TX that didn't want us to be adopted by our parents in Los Angeles. I am stunned. Trying to understand. Both my twin and I wish we never found out. Anybody relating to finding out such news late in life i would appricate replying. Thanks
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Kaysbobbi! I am soo sorry that you found out so late in your life . . .I found a few websites w/ people who may relate to you. I hope this helps :grouphug:
Illen Rachel -Adoptee's website about her late discovery
[url=http://www.geocities.com/poetmom2/]Late Discovery Adoption Story by Ilene Rachel[/url]
Article by Late Discovery Adoptee
[url=http://library.adoption.com/Adult-Adoptees/Identity-Theft-and-Recovery/article/2811/1.html]Identity Theft and Recovery: -[/url]
Late Discovery Adoption Research study
[url]http://www.bensoc.org.au/uploads/documents/why-wasnt-i-told-may2001.pdf[/url]
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Kaysbobbi
At 68 that would have been a shock to you both. ((Hugs)) to you both.
I think it is the all-consuming emotions of who am I and did I belong that trip you up, and as older women we tend to use the past to remember the good times. Now you are unsure of everything you knew to be true.
All I have to offer is that you can't be loved by too many people. You obviously have a half sister who wants to share herself with kin. Maybe this will be the blessing you need.
I'm a birthmother - not an adoptee. Most birthmothers loved the children they bore and passed to a good family. I know I did. And that love grew through the years even though I had no idea where my son was or even if he was still alive. After 33 years we met and continue to be part of each others lives in an adult but loving way. It's not the same as my relationship with my later children, but it's more precious
What I'm trying to say is don't be too hard on your bmother - I doubt she had options. And she would have carried her loss to the grave.
Life is for the living. And contrary to the old addage, you can choose your family but only in extraordinary circumstances.
Regards
Ann
Kaysbobbi,
So very sorry for your recent discovery. Next month will be a year since mine at the age of 42. Mine is a bit different since I was led to believe my birth father was my older brother, who was rather estranged anyway, but around. Regardless the end result is betrayal and loss of what I beleived for 42 years was my only family.
Feel free to PM me if you would like, I don't have my own PC but come to the Library often. Words were and still are hard to come by for me as the emotional often takes over the rational. I am doing much better now, and I will be praying for you.
God bless you.
Marilyn