Full Circle: My Adoption Story

I found this poem written by another adoptee about a birthmom releasing her daughter for adoption: ""In the stillness of the morning - In the hush before the dawn - a cry screams through the silence - And a new life has been born. And she wonders what will happen - to her newborn baby girl - how she wishes she could keep her - And protect her from the world. But she knows that there are others - Who would gladly give the world - to have the chance to hold and love - her precious little girl. And she prays to God for guidance - as she holds that tiny hand - With the desperate hope that someday - her child will understand. "So she bravely signs the papers - And the tears fall from her eyes - As she signs away her baby - the light inside her dies. One last kiss she gives her darling - for the "others" have now come - to claim the life she gave them - now a family has begun. " Elaine Rideau Tomlin [url=http://www.comeunity.com/adoption/adopt/sharing-poem.html]Adoptee Poem Sharing[/url] Adoption stimulates a cycle of hurt, pain, rejection and love. Rejection because of love is a difficult concept for an adoptee to comprehend. But in the instance of most adoptions, the rejection of the biological parents is due to love and the acceptance of the adoptive parents is due to love. Real pain and real love are juxtaposed forever. Adoption is my story. Born to an 18 year old white female and 19 year old black male I was released for adoption. My birth parents were young and unprepared to care for me. They wanted me to have a chance at a good life. My adoptive parents were told by a social worker that people would not have been particularly receptive to a biracial child at the time of my birth. Complexity, love and perhaps racism haunted my birth. I've always known that I was adopted. Every year we celebrate my birthday and my adoption day. When I was 5 years old, we adopted my brother who at the time was 4 years of age. From then, I've pretty much had a clear understanding of what adoption meant. (As much as a little kid can comprehend). My mom and dad have always told us how special we are to having been chosen. Growing up, I've often thought of my birth mom - especially on my birthday and Mother's Day. I do know that my birth mom did a loving and what must have been a painful and scary thing, but I am thankful in the decision she made with giving me a life and a loving family. It was a very brave and courageous act made on her behalf to terminate her parental rights in hopes of me having a great life. Likewise, it was a very brave and courageous act on my mom and dad's behalf in raising me and loving me as their own. I don't remember ever having resentful feelings towards my birth mom and her decision. I believe that a lot of that has to do with how my parents raised me, how open they were with me with who I am. They were always available to answer any questions to the best of their knowledge and ability and were reassuring - both to myself and my brother. I always was hopeful that at the right time and place in my life I would find and meet by birth mom. Recently it came true. I met my birth mom for the first time in 22 years and it has been a positive experience. I have two more brothers in my life and we're all continuing to build our relationship and get to know each other more. I am very fortunate and blessed in being born into a great family and raised by a great family. I thank God everyday. The cycle of adoption is well on its away to completion. :)