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I feel sad for both the b-mom and her son. I can only imagine how emotionally tumultuous and confusing their reunion must have been. As I'm sure that the wider community will just see the shock value, I must say that all I feel is empathy for both of them since I now know just how complicated reunion is.
This case of genetic sexual attraction is just one more example of why post-adoption, particularly reunion mediation services, are so needed.
[url=http://www.insidebayarea.com/ci_15501547?IADID=Search-www.insidebayarea.com-www.insidebayarea.com]Mich. woman gets prison sentence for sex with son - Inside Bay Area[/url]
This case is so disturbing on so many levels. Putting genetic sexual attraction aside for a moment, this woman sought out her son on Facebook when he was only 14 years old -- totally inappropriate in my opinion.
I just don't know what to say. From what I've read, GSA is very real and very complex. I don't understand it...or maybe I just don't want to understand it.
I agree with you, Ripples, about the need for postadoption reunion services. I think it's especially important when reuniting with an adolescent. Both my son and I, as well as his parents, were extensively prepared and counseled before meeting face to face shortly after he turned 18. The agency's postadoptions caseworker was wonderful -- I saw her whenever I was in my hometown for about two years leading up to the reunion. We had at least 10 counseling sessions in that period of time. I also joined a triad support group about a year before reuniting...it was invaluable.
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RavenSong
This case is so disturbing on so many levels. Putting genetic sexual attraction aside for a moment, this woman sought out her son on Facebook when he was only 14 years old -- totally inappropriate in my opinion.
I just don't know what to say. From what I've read, GSA is very real and very complex. I don't understand it...or maybe I just don't want to understand it.
I agree with you, Ripples, about the need for postadoption reunion services. I think it's especially important when reuniting with an adolescent. Both my son and I, as well as his parents, were extensively prepared and counseled before meeting face to face shortly after he turned 18. The agency's postadoptions caseworker was wonderful -- I saw her whenever I was in my hometown for about two years leading up to the reunion. We had at least 10 counseling sessions in that period of time. I also joined a triad support group about a year before reuniting...it was invaluable.
I think seeking out someone via Facebook is pretty common nowadays - I'm not condoning Facebook as a primary first contact point with such highly sensitive stuff. However, now that I know how insanely emotive search and reunion can be, I can understand how one thing led to another and ended in such tragedy.
I did feel a certain weird kinda GSA towards my b-brother - it was fleeting and I didn't act on it. I stumbled across my b-family so unexpectedly and was so unprepared. We all got swept up in incredibly overwhelming emotions. I just felt slammed with such intense feelings of wanting to never lose them again. I even offered to sponsor my b-siblings for immigration to Australia upon meeting them within a few days! How insane is that???!! Luckily I woke up in time to the fact that I was dealing with people I hardly knew.
So all I'm saying is that while I don't condone adults engaging in sex with minors, I can understand how GSA and the complexities of reunion swept them both up into actions that are now deeply regrettable. My heart goes out to them both. I can only imagine the depth of anguish, pain, confusion, shame and repeated loss that they must both be going through at a time when they probably need compassion and counselling most.