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I first want to tell all you birth mothers how amazing you are. You hold a special place in my heart. I was adopted and I know how difficult it must be.
I was just wondering what do you look for when you starting looking to place a child for adoption? Do you look for similar interests, hobbies, pictures, have children, no children, working mom etc.?
My wife and I have been trying for a while and we were just wondering. Thanks for your help.
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Every birthparent wants something different for their child. Some want a 2 parent home, some are OK with single people being their child's parent. Some want a stay at home mom, some are OK with working moms. I could go on and on. My advice is to be open and honest when you make your profile. Something in that profile will stand out to a birthmom and she will pick you. For the son that I placed, I wanted him to have a good man for a father. The family that I picked had been married for over 10 years and they both owned their own business. He owned a construction business and she owned a bakery. He helped her with her bakery in the off season. The birthmom of the son that I adopted wanted a fun and loving family for her son. There was a picture of my hubby and I taken with Kermit the Frog in our profile. There was also a picture of my hubby with his head in the mouth of Sigfreid and Roy's tiger at a wax museum. She liked that we traveled alot and were silly and fun. You just never know what will speak to a birthmom. Good Luck in your adoption journey!
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i looked for a couple who had similar parenting skills as me and everything. i looked for a stay at home parent because i don't think children should be in daycare constantly. i think i was lucky to really find a couple for a match because we are so much alike, personalities and all. honesty is another thing i looked for. kids or no kids were never an issue with me, honestly. i hope this helps you out some!
I looked for a family that would match as closely to what she would have had if I had been able to keep her. They had an older child (My son is 10 mnts older than her), a medically based family (I have SIDS in our family - lost 2 children in family and one had a machine for 2 years) but most important to me was that she would be raised in a 2 parent, faith based family.
I would say for me I wanted a family who could give my child all the things I thought I could (my values and sensibilities), as well as the things I worried that I couldn't (stability). There are so many good families out there that it was a hard decision, and when I had narrowed it down to those I thought were the best fits my final decision came down to those who shared my religion and were close to my age (the couple were both 35). Again it's different for everyone, some chose by pictures, others might have one particular thing they are looking for.
I hope this helps and I hope you the perfect fit finds you.
We wanted someone who we could trust (we didn't think they would change their mind about anything we verbally agreed on) Honestly someone who I thought would be better parents than my own but not someone who would let them do what ever they wanted. Thats really as much as we went into it, we were lucky and our couple kinda fell into our lap and we really just thought they were perfect. Good luck to you and your wife.
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