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Hello all!
I have posted here several times, but I wanted to post a little bit about my new journey.
I was liscensed in northern florida for 2 years and had 7 great kids from ages 2-16.
I moved to south Florida where I am from to better serve the children I would have in foster care with me, as there is so much more to do and better resources than the small town I lived in. I should have done a little more research, but once I got to south Florida I found out my sister who was sharing my home was not allowed to live in the home while I fostered due to a 3 year old non violent felony. I tried everything I knew to do to make it happen even going to the CEO of the agency because my sister has been a HUGE help with the kids and has been a big part of the lives of the children I have had. As a single Foster parent, she has been there to help me tremendously and I wanted her to be part of this, but they absolutly would not budge on it, so I had to take a break while giving my sister time to find a place of her own.
That time has come.
my sister moved out in Dec.
I made contact right away with the agency and started getting things put together.
and yesterday I had my health dept. inspection which I passed. Hopefully I will be getting the HUGE packet today and I can get it filled out and turned back into to them asap!! They are hoping to have me approved in Feb. I am so excited about this new journey and I will keep you posted.
one more thing, Being a foster parent has been an awesome experience for me, I wish that I could find a way to convince others to take the chance to do it.
any advice on doing this???
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What are of South Florida are you in?
We are in Palm Beach county and are registered for MAPP classes starting in February but are still very nervous about the process. We would like to Foster-to-Adopt. We have friends that were successful at this and are prepared (or so we think) for the not-so-happy parts of this process as well.
Some of the posts on this Board are discouraging but it seems as though you have had good experiences. Are you planning to stay a Foster parent or would you like to adopt in the end as well? Do you work outside the home?
We both work full-time and this adds to the anxiety of the situation as well. Both of our jobs are flexible about taking time off but how much would I have to expect to do in the beginning of placement?
Also we do have a bio daughter (age 7) and we are unsure what to tell her about the process. I know she cries at night for a sibling but we really need to stress the importance of making sure she knows that the best outcome would be to reunite the child with their birthparents so she doesn't have unrealistic expectations as well. Any other suggestions?
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What are of South Florida are you in?
We are in Palm Beach county and are registered for MAPP classes starting in February but are still very nervous about the process. We would like to Foster-to-Adopt. We have friends that were successful at this and are prepared (or so we think) for the not-so-happy parts of this process as well.
Some of the posts on this Board are discouraging but it seems as though you have had good experiences. Are you planning to stay a Foster parent or would you like to adopt in the end as well? Do you work outside the home?
We both work full-time and this adds to the anxiety of the situation as well. Both of our jobs are flexible about taking time off but how much would I have to expect to do in the beginning of placement?
Also we do have a bio daughter (age 7) and we are unsure what to tell her about the process. I know she cries at night for a sibling but we really need to stress the importance of making sure she knows that the best outcome would be to reunite the child with their birthparents so she doesn't have unrealistic expectations as well. Any other suggestions?
I thought I had replied to this, but I just saw that I didn't.
I am in st lucie county.
Yes, I have had some good experiences, but I will tell you, it can be very very very trying. Mostly the cw's!!! The kids I have had have given me some trouble, but we managed to get through it, but sometimes what is expected by cw's gets difficult.
I am single, yes I work outside the home. Adding to the difficulty of working outside the home, I work nights. I had the perfect situation, my sister was living with me, she would be there at night and I would be there during the day. However, she was arrested 3 years ago on a theft charge and they absolutly would not let her live with me. That was very bad news because I relocated to better the experience with fc and it was delayed for a year because of it, my sister had to move out and I have restarted the process again. She moved Dec 3, and just last week, I finally had a visit to do the home study. My last one is Tuesday. I have everything done now except cpr which I will do on Tuesday before she comes. (im hoping!)
Finding reliable child care for eveing hours is very tough and very expensive, so at this point I am looking at getting a different job. Ideally, they want you to have a 8-5 monday -friday job, the problem is, they also want you to bring child to dr within 72 hours, get child in school within 48 hours, bring child to therapists, court, parents meetings, and where ever else you have to bring them. Working my shift is great for this, because I can do all those things due to being off during the week some, but they frown on me working weekends... :-( I explained I am looking into a new job ( i have an interview wed that I feel good about )
This process is long, its frustrating, tideious, and at times you just feel like... Y??? but once you get called with your first child.. you will know y!!!
** few things, this agency I am working with now has given me ideas that I never did before. document everything!!! I bought a bunch of spiral note books when they were like 13cents before school.. when I get a child, I will start writing.
log your visits from cw and make your next apt before they leave your home. If you don't, they will call you on the 30th day because they have to see the child IN YOUR HOME every 30 days. Without fail, you will have something planned and they will tell you, they HAVE to come that day!! that's annoying!!
**if your taking vaca, make sure you plan it with cw, even in state, while you can travel in state with the child, if it interferes with regularirly scheduled visits, they MAY NOT let you take the child. I ran into that a few times, because dad MIGHT decide to show up, even though he had missed 8 straight weeks, I had to redo the whole vaca because that time is his time.
*** remember you are not the MOM, no matter how much you want to be, until there is an adoption, that child has a mom. Instead of trying to replace mom, try to facilitate the relationship between the parents and the child. This can be hard, but I have found it's worth it. I am able to talk to ALL of the children I have had because their parents trust me. The children will appriciate this too....
** really understand where these kids come from the best you can, you will see things you never thought possible, you will give to them with all your heart and soul and they sometimes, just will not love you, will not attach, or will do what ever it takes to push you away. Its their way of survival, don't give up!! You will find yourself thinking, I have given them everything I possibly can yet, this is how im treated... get used to it!!
wow.. I am getting long winded... I wish you the very best and would love to talk more... if you have any more questions!
Take care,
Stephanie
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What are of South Florida are you in?
We are in Palm Beach county and are registered for MAPP classes starting in February but are still very nervous about the process. We would like to Foster-to-Adopt. We have friends that were successful at this and are prepared (or so we think) for the not-so-happy parts of this process as well.
I thought I had replied to this, but I just saw that I didn't.
I am in st lucie county.
Yes, I have had some good experiences, but I will tell you, it can be very very very trying. Mostly the cw's!!! The kids I have had have given me some trouble, but we managed to get through it, but sometimes what is expected by cw's gets difficult.
I am single, yes I work outside the home. Adding to the difficulty of working outside the home, I work nights. I had the perfect situation, my sister was living with me, she would be there at night and I would be there during the day. However, she was arrested 3 years ago on a theft charge and they absolutly would not let her live with me. That was very bad news because I relocated to better the experience with fc and it was delayed for a year because of it, my sister had to move out and I have restarted the process again. She moved Dec 3, and just last week, I finally had a visit to do the home study. My last one is Tuesday. I have everything done now except cpr which I will do on Tuesday before she comes. (im hoping!)
Finding reliable child care for eveing hours is very tough and very expensive, so at this point I am looking at getting a different job. Ideally, they want you to have a 8-5 monday -friday job, the problem is, they also want you to bring child to dr within 72 hours, get child in school within 48 hours, bring child to therapists, court, parents meetings, and where ever else you have to bring them. Working my shift is great for this, because I can do all those things due to being off during the week some, but they frown on me working weekends... :-( I explained I am looking into a new job ( i have an interview wed that I feel good about )
This process is long, its frustrating, tideious, and at times you just feel like... Y??? but once you get called with your first child.. you will know y!!!
** few things, this agency I am working with now has given me ideas that I never did before. document everything!!! I bought a bunch of spiral note books when they were like 13cents before school.. when I get a child, I will start writing.
log your visits from cw and make your next apt before they leave your home. If you don't, they will call you on the 30th day because they have to see the child IN YOUR HOME every 30 days. Without fail, you will have something planned and they will tell you, they HAVE to come that day!! that's annoying!!
**if your taking vaca, make sure you plan it with cw, even in state, while you can travel in state with the child, if it interferes with regularirly scheduled visits, they MAY NOT let you take the child. I ran into that a few times, because dad MIGHT decide to show up, even though he had missed 8 straight weeks, I had to redo the whole vaca because that time is his time.
*** remember you are not the MOM, no matter how much you want to be, until there is an adoption, that child has a mom. Instead of trying to replace mom, try to facilitate the relationship between the parents and the child. This can be hard, but I have found it's worth it. I am able to talk to ALL of the children I have had because their parents trust me. The children will appriciate this too....
** really understand where these kids come from the best you can, you will see things you never thought possible, you will give to them with all your heart and soul and they sometimes, just will not love you, will not attach, or will do what ever it takes to push you away. Its their way of survival, don't give up!! You will find yourself thinking, I have given them everything I possibly can yet, this is how im treated... get used to it!!
wow.. I am getting long winded... I wish you the very best and would love to talk more... if you have any more questions!
Take care,
Stephanie
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