She'll be 18 soon...

I wonder if she'll even want to find me? I was 16 when she was born, and didn't do the whole letter writing thing like I should have. I was in touch sporadically until she was ten, then I was told that a letter had upset her. I haven't been in touch since. I'm trying to make sure that she can easily get my contact info when the time comes, if she wants it. What more can I do? I have lost touch with the birth mother, who I think has an address and phone number. The adoption agency is being difficult about things, as they have "re-organized" and apparently the records from '93 are in some shed somewhere. Otherwise I'd ask them to forward a communication, but they have to have the record stating it's an open adoption before even taking a communication. Is there anything to do but sit back and hope she'll contact me? I agonize about whether she will or not. I try to cover it up, though, as I have a wife and 7 other beautiful children. Just thinking about this brings tears to my eyes. What if she wants no part of me, you know? I mean, I couldn't blame her, based on my contact with her and all. Maybe it's foolish to hope. I still do. I suppose I'm just foolish.