I Need To Know That Their is Still Hope

I registered on here maybe a year ago possibly two to try and find something or do something but still nothing. I am 21 now and yes I'm still young but time goes by faster and faster and ticking away and I feel like I will never find my birth family. I was born June 12th 1989 in Detroit Michigan am of Hispanic descent, never known any identifying info about my birth family only non identifying. When I contacted the agency possibly a yr or two ago no one answered. I left a message but got nothing back. They sent me non identifying info when I was 14 when I sent them a check and it was shocking info but helpful. What if their is no identifying info out there for me? I got really into finding out something when I was about 15 or 16 looked on the internet everywhere did all I could but when you only have a very common last name of your birth family which is Ramirez it's very hard and most places want money. Then yrs go by and I wonder why do I care to find out this, I'm no different then someone that wasn't adopted. I don't feel different and my family is my family and my real family at that in my heart and I feel bad wanting to know this or caring at times because then it's like saying that my family isn't good enough. I know that's not the case but back in the day my mom would get mad for caring about this, she later on tried to help me find my half sister but only my half sister. She would never want me looking for my birth mom because she had a bad past and she would feel bad. How can I keep searching discreetly? How could I ever keep searching when I have no credit card to pay for anything on the internet that might help me and I have no checking account to send the agency. I'm sorry for this being so long and sorry for not really making sense but if anyone reads this and has any advice I would really appreciate it. I also feel bad because their are people out there that tirelessly look and want to find their birth family and they never give up and it's like to me it doesn't really affect me it's just like a story that's not really my own life but then again at times it does affect me. I feel bad when I care and then I feel bad when I don't. I just don't feel like I was adopted at 6 months at all and I would only tell people to have something interesting to say and to make a good story even though what I was saying was true. Thank you