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A few days ago, my mother told me that in her youth she was raped, became pregnant, and gave the child up for adoption. It was the '60s, and as a result of stigma, she has only told two people, including myself, about the rape, pregnancy, and adoption in her entire life. I'm concerned about resources for myself as a newly informed birth sibling, but I am more concerned about how to help her deal with these serious issues in her own life. Books on surviving rape are fairly easy to come by, but UNBIASED, non-political books supporting birth moms who've been raped seem to be mysteriously absent from the interwebs. Can anyone help me find a book that would help and not politicize the issue around rape, pregnancy, and adoption?
Secondly, am I doing more harm than good by trying to help? If she receives a package in the mail from me (we don't live near each other) with supportive books on rape and adoption, will it just open the wound and cause more damage? She's not in therapy and hasn't sought crisis services--as far as I can tell it has just been bottled up and silenced for 40 years.
I really don't know what to do or how to help. I'd be grateful for any suggestions. Thanks.
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