Trouble bonding with adoptive child

You're received some good advice about being patient, faking it until you make it, and considering an attachment therapist. I'll re-enforce the suggestion about an attachment therapist. Her behaviors sound very much like a child who is unable to trust and attach. You might read up some on attachment problems and see if you think your daughter fits the description. Let me add that about 85% of the 100s of children I've worked with who have attachment issues have been first diagnosed with ADD/ADHD. There isn't enough awareness about attachment so many mental health professionals just assume that the behaviors are ADHD. What is often the case is that the ADHD-like behaviors are a manifestation of feeling insecure, unsafe, and unable to trust. Once the attachment/trust issues are fully addressed, the over-active behaviors calm down. Also, as you're researching RAD and/or finding an attachment therapist, continue what you're doing which is to try and balance the structure with the nurturing. She needs the structure and boundaries to feel safe (even if she complains!) and the nurturing to learn a new way to positively interact with parents. Try to sneak in lots of hugs, rubbing her back, ticking her toes, drawing letters on her back, rocking her in a rocking chair, singing with her, playing board games, etc.Thanks for sharing and let us know how things go.Susan WardOlder Child Adoption Support[url=http://www.olderchildadoptionsupport.com]Older Child Adoption Support - Main Page[/url]