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The prices some of these companies charge are waaayyy out of my price range or such a service. At the same time, I can't help but think that if I've had no luck so far... what better investment could ya make than tracking down your birth parents? I have spoke with a few companies that do this sort of thing as well as private investigators. Knowing many of you are in or have been in my shoes, I'm curious if anyone ever went this route, or at very least what they would pay someone to do it?
I found a couple companies that are legit and cost around 2000 to do a search. But I also found someone that will do it for a bit more than that. I am really strapped financially but if I was told I could pay a couple thousand dollars to have my birth parents- I cant turn that down! Dh doesn't quite understand but he supports me. He was worried about my spending the money and getting nothing in return. I found someone though that only wants 1000 to retain him. If he finds my parents, I have to pay him 2000 more, but if he doesn't I dont pay him anything else. So doesn't it sound smarter to go with that guy since I'll only pay 1000 if he doesn't find anything instead of 2000 for the bigger companies and they may not find anything either? Ahhhh I'm losin it. I hope my parents know what I'm going through for them someday!
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Be very careful. I spent over $2,000 on a company that advertises here and once they had my money I never heard from them again. I recently checked on another, from here, and this business wont take money up front, but wants over $3,000 paid in full when they have information regarding the person you want to find. Sound reasonable?
I read the entire contract and they are held blameless (in other words: no refund) if the name they give you is not the right person, meaning they can pick a name out of a phone book and then say, "oops". Shame me once...I'm pretty careful now.
If I knew I wasn't going to be scammed again, I'd happily pay the retainer and/or search fees for someone, so I understand how you feel.
Instead, I've registered everywhere I know of. Have you registered at ISRR?
Good luck. Let us know what you decide and how it turns out.
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I will try not to sound overly cynical but will probably fail gloriously! The amounts being demanded, whether up front or on delivery (regardless of what it is the person may ever deliver) are quite high. I fully understand what you mean when you say "if I could spend X and be able to contact my birth family..." but the problem is there's no guarantee of that.
In my case I was lucky enough to find my birth family with the assistance of one of the search angels from this site. We had some mixed lines of communication in that we didn't discuss money before she did the work, but I gladly paid her the "customary" fee which was much less than the amounts you've been quoted.
If you can find someone who works in your area you may be much better off. A little work up front could save you bunches in the long term.
Best,
PADJ
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littletraveler
How on earth do you find a search angel?
Goodness- just google them. They are everywhere. I'm sure there are even some on this site. However, as I stated before, I've been one. They are essentially, internet-savvy people with perhaps a little, though usually no education on legal jargon. Just common sense knowledge. If you have the names of who you are looking for and any other info- they may be able to find them, but they don't do anything you can't do. If you google them and start going through website posts of people searching for someone.. you will see the search angel's replies are generally copied and pasted from sites like whitepages.com or classmates. They just canvas normal websites like those looking for people by the name you gave int he area you gave and give them all to you. A professional on the other hand, delifvers you the actual person because they do have access to things regular civilians do not. Nonetheless, we're getting off topic. I was just looking for opinions. I don't think it can get any better than a grand. I pay him 2000 more if he finds them for sure. There is no... "if he finds someone by that name etc". I've had a lawyer review the guys contract. He comes widely recommended. I think I'm gonna do it. I understand not everyone has the money to do this kind of thing. I am by no means rolling in it, but I know I can make some concessions in my life for the next few months to save up for it. It's worth it to me.
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I considered this myself. I searched 14 years for my brother and only knew his first name and birthdate. I found him 13 days ago. I would not pay anyone just yet. I have now became a search angel and would be more than glad to help you anyway I can. How much information do you have?
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This is my way of giving back. I do not want anything in return. I feel like I was blessed and found my brother and know exactly how you guys feel.
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DO NOT pay for someone to search. If the information is really available there are free sites and free search angels who won't "tease" you and rip you off!
My son and I found one another through a free site, one NOT devoted to facilitating adoption, and maintained by someone who had been through adoption and search.
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