1st Contact!

Please see the link below for more previous details about my search. [url]https://www.facebook.com/groups/214171008602283/[/url] Well it's taken me all week to actually be able to sit down and write this, been a crazy week but a blessed one to say the least. Rewind to about 4-5 months ago to June, when my social worker had her 1st contact with my birth mother. Well, the conversation was left with the thought my birth Mom would get back in touch with my social worker as soon as she felt ready. Seeing that my birth parents ended up married (and still are to this day) I figured there wouldn't be many hurdles and I would hear back from my birth Mom in no time. Well my expectations proved to be a bit off. 4-5 months went by and I hadn't heard anything. Rewind to this past Sunday, October 30th. My 28th birthday was coming up on Monday the 31st, and for some reason, my birth family was just on my heart, especially my mother. Feelings of frustration, anger, fear, all were creeping into my mind this Sunday as I went to church and went about the day. Well that night, at Advance (student ministry program we are a part of) we began our normal worship set. As I was worshiping our great God through song, a feeling came over me like I have never felt before in my life. Some of you will automatically place me in the "crazy" camp, but I really don't care. I have no reason to lie about this. Anyways, this feeling, was a cold chill down my entire body as I was singing. Then, faintly, but audibly, I heard someone speak to me, which I believe was God or a messenger for the Lord himself. This voice told me this phrase, "Do not worry, she will contact you tomorrow." Obviously, I was a bit taken back. What person doesn't sometimes hear voice in their head? I chalked this up as one of those moments, which in reality, was just a lack of faith for me. Despite brushing it off my shoulder throughout that night, I really couldn't get it off my mind. The faith the Lord has given me wanted to believe so badly that he spoke to me that night, and that I would truly finally hear from my birth mother on my 28th birthday the next day. Well, I went to bed that night, and woke up Monday the 31st on my birthday feeling great. Ashley Flouhouse Mokris made me a great big breakfast, and off to work I went, a tad late, but well worth the extra time with my beauty and my baby. That day at work, I continued to think about my experience the night before, wondering if today was the day I was going to hear from my birth mother. As I was in a few meetings that day, TWICE, I got calls on my cell phone from numbers I did not recognize whatsoever. Not being able to pick them up, I began wondering and thinking that it had to be my birth mother. No voicemails were left, and they did not call back. That evening, Ashley had set up a party with all of my closest friends and family, and we had an unbelievable night of fellowship celebrating both my birthday and Halloween. Thank you to all who came! I continued to wonder if I would get a call that day from my birth mother, and had my phone attached to my hip the entire night. Nothing ended up happening, and everyone had left the party except my best buddy Ryan. As Ryan was leaving that night, the last one to leave, his last words to me were, "I really wish your birth Mom would get in touch with you so I could tell her how much I love her for having you." I said goodnight and then went to bed. The next morning, Nov 1st arrived. I woke and my normal routine of turning on my phone and checking my emails proceeded. As I loaded my email, 8 or so popped up like they normally do, of which 6 of them I normally delete and a few I keep. As I was scrolling through the emails, I see one from a name I had never seen before, a woman's name. I nearly press Delete, but something made me open it. In the subject line was "hope you had a good birthday." The 1st couple lines read, "I have been dreaming for many years of being able to tell you that it indeed was a happy "birth" day. Unfortunately, it was also one of the saddest days of my life when I temporarily said goodbye to you. My prayers have been that every year God has given you, have been abundantly blessed." To say I was shocked was an understatement. I immediately yelled to Ashley, in tears, that this was my birth mother writing me. I read the email just weeping, joyfully at that, knowing this was the 1st contact I had had with my birth mother. She proceeded to tell me she left a message with the social worker but never got a call back, but that once she knew I was looking for her, she began her own search, and after some time, was able to find this very Facebook group, where she saw the letter she had written me 3 days after I was born. She was absolutely thrilled to have found me, and finally got the nerve to contact me. She is still married to my birth father, they have a 2 other children, and the boy plays college basketball as well (my bro!). The most shocking thing that got me was after I read the email, I wanted to see when she sent it since it had been some time since I had my phone on. I checked the timestamp on my gmail, and it said 11:58pm on October 31st. Right when I saw this, I cried even more, knowing God had answered my prayer, and that he had spoke to me the day prior. I'm so thankful for this story. Not only have a lived a life completely undeserved, but God has truly made known to me the reality of himself laying his life down so that I may live. While my physical birth is of great value, my eternal life through Jesus is the greatest gift I have been given. I'm so thankful God worked in my birth mother's heart to quit college, move to a town by herself, and have me. I'm so thankful that God has used this is my life to draw me to Him, to point me to the one Savior who left His throne, came to a broken world, lived a perfect life, and died a sinner's death, all so I and the rest of his children could be adopted into the Family of God himself. What a glorious Savior we have! My story was not a surprise to him, I just am thankful he chose me to play a small part in his grand story. For His Name, Taylor Mokris