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[FONT="Lucida Sans Unicode"][/FONT]Ever since I joined this site, I have wondered how I would find the answers I lacked about my adoption. I have had many of the fragments of my adoption told to me since I was about 8 years-old, but I never had a full picture. Throughout the years, I have met my Foster Family, and I knew those were the people I bonded with as a child. However, I met my biological parents and siblings when I was 21. I thought all of my questions would be answered. They were not answered. I sit here, before my 34th Birthday and I am staring at reality in the face. I have celebrated a Birthday that is not "mine", and I have told people my whole life that I was born and raised in a State; that I was never born in. How did I find out these facts? By doing a lot of digging. What truly disturbs me is; I still cannot get my hands on my own adoption records in order to fit the rest of the puzzle pieces together. Why can't I just ask the people I met when I was 21? My mother never wanted anything to do with me. She lost 21 years of her life, and she never wanted to redeem those 21 years. My father died in 2009. My brother lives in MN, and he has blocked everyone from communication. The only one I talk to is someone else looking for answers; my twin brother who was adopted with me. I was born in Lompoc, California, and I was born a year earlier than I have celebrated my whole life. Does this not go against medical protocol?No wonder the doctors look at me funny when I tell them I am only 33. They did an MRI on me when I was 32, and they kept questioning my age. I need medical records from when I was an infant, but I have been denied those records. This is beginning to really irk me. Can I not petition the court without involving the "parents" that deny me this right?
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It is so interesting that you called this a jigsaw puzzle because I got a small puzzle piece tattoo with a heart in the middle, standing for my adoption and my "piece of the puzzle". I can't even imagine going through what you are going through. I understand why you are hurting. What are the rest of the puzzle pieces that you think your adoption records will help you with? Did you get to ask your birth mother any questions when you met her? Is it those unanswered questions that are making you feel incomplete?This is my Vlog: [url=http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=UUXicJSZm00bamuNRrqfIPzw]Uploaded videos - YouTube[/url] I talk about adoption from the perspective of an adoptee and post a new video every Sunday. :)
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Dear AHH, I'm sorry for your pain. I petitioned the court over ten years ago and they turned me down. I know some laws have changed but I'm not sure which states they are. I went on line and found someone about 12 years ago -- an adoptee himself who enjoyed searching for fun -- and he actually found my birth mother very quickly with what little information I had. I think he had an "in" with someone at the court house and pulled my records. I gave him my social, dob (which I know you do not have - I'm sorry), area of birth -- and I believe that's it. He was able to give info regarding my birth mom, half siblings, and birth father. Years later I hired a private investigator to find my birth father -- complete waste of money, as he was a jerk!
Maybe you too will find a kind soul who has a heart for adoptees searching -- I wish you well on your journey.
I too am irked by the system!