2nd Reunion

May 16, 2012

[FONT="Arial"]Back in 1998 I met my older brother, father and mother. However... the reunion was chaos. I never had questions answered that were loading my heart down. The reunion turned into a bittersweet event, and I walked away defeated. As some know, my father passed away in 2009, and I thought, "Well, there is that.. I will never know for sure." My mother made it clear that she never wanted to see me again. Why? Because at that time it had been 21 years, and she said, "They took 21-years of her life away, and that reunion could do nothing to give her those 21-years back." Rather than trying to understand her.. I walked away defeated. My sister.. I only remember by sight. I never got to know her. Her husband kept me away from her. The only one that I truly got to know was my older brother, and he left without warning.
Through all of this by August of 1999, I felt that it was a reunion that should have never happened, and I accomplished nothing. I felt that everyone was right, and my biological family were nothing more than a bunch of bad apples. So, for the next decade I kept wondering how in the world did I turn out so differently? Even growing up with my twin brother in the same household.. I was nothing like him.
In the month, I learned that my older brother lived in St Paul, MN, and my heart soared.. I tried to contact him on Facebook, but I learned that his account was no longer active.. As my heart soared.. my heart took a quick dive into the bottom of my stomach. I was like, well heck. I wanted to get into contact with him or my sister. At this point in my life... I really do not care about my biological parents, but I wanted contact with someone who could get to know me, and appreciate me without all the bad memories associated with me.
In the last week, my brother and I have reunited on Facebook, have talked for hours on Yahoo, and we are meeting each other in Chicago while I have a 6 hour layover. The things that I have learned from him, things about my past, and the things about our parents have put my mind at ease.
My brother and I are so much alike it is so surreal. We like the same shows, foods, games, movies, and we know so much about computers. I think it is so odd that we are more alike than my twin and I are. We get each other. He also answered a lot of questions about where I was born, when I was born, and about the relationship status between my mother and father during the abuse that caused my my adoption.
In previous posts I shared that I found out that I was born in Lompoc, California in 77.. My older brother cracked up at this. He told me that he was the only one born in Lompoc. Everyone else was born in Texas. He told me that my twin brother needs to stop trying to fit puzzle pieces together that are not there. I also have a family tree that I can learn from. Before this past week, I only knew first names and one last name. Today, I know a full family history.
I pray that every one of you find what you are searching for. I am still in search for my sisters. I have a full blood sister and 4 half sisters. I know where one half sister is, but making contact is going to be trying. I can have satisfaction in knowing that I have accomplished most of the task by reuniting with my older brother (again). This reunion is so much easier than the first time around without so many people trying to get in t he way. [/FONT]