what if

No it isn't selfish to continue to search and you don't know if your natural mother doesn't want to be found. My son was searching for me and found family members who told him that I didn't want to be found. This wasn't true and we did reunite 5 years into his search. Please don't give up hope. Nobody can assume what your natural mother is thinking or if she wants to be found. There is a good chance that she doesn't think she has the moral right to search, maybe she feels you may not like it if she contacted you first either. Nobody can tell you except her so try not to give up and she may be searching as well

i can only speak for myself but as a birthfather searching for my kids i PRAY that they are searching for me as well.