Advertisements
Hi - This is my first post here and would love to hear opinions and experiences. :) My birth mother sought me out about seven years ago and we began contact but she was a little pushy and tended to go way too quickly so we took a (long) break as I dealt with all the anger and emotion and everything. Now, we have gotten into the process again and it's going really really well. HOWEVER, in getting to know my birth family (bio parents ended up married with more kids), I have realized that I just don't really particularly like them all that well and I don't enjoy spending time with them. I know this sounds horrible and I wish it were different, but what should I do? I have no desire to cut off contact; they are lovely people and I appreciate getting to know them. It's just that they aren't people I would normally choose to spend time with but have they crossed the line into 'family so you're stuck with them'? How would you approach this or should I just suck it up and continue as is? They are pushing to hang out with my family which includes my husband and our three young kids and I just don't know how to tell them that we may have come to the end of our progress...? Argh. Thanks for any and all advice. Sorry for the awkward first posting... ;)
Like
Share
Advertisements
thisralv, Is it possible that even though you dealt with the visible anger you felt that it is still lingering in your subconsciousness? I say this in all sincerity because sometimes we just can't get totally past feelings despite believing we have or should have. If you don't want to stop contact then you at least need to be honest and let them know you aren't comfortable with lots of contact. That it might simply be because of lack of memories that a regular family has to fall back on to keep them together because of history. Tell them what makes you comfortable and you might be surprised to find out they are trying to make sure you are welcome. Kind regards,Dickons