found info on birth mom.....NOW WHAT?????? advice????

August 8, 2012

i recently applied to get my live birth info and received it rather quickly.......after learning of my mother's name i obviously hopped on the internet and searched.......to my surprise i found out who her siblings ( my aunts and uncles) and also my cousins.......with the magic of facebook i was able to find a picture of my birth mother which left me kinda stunned and confused.......my question is is it ok to write an aunt or uncle and ask for confirmation this may in fact be my mother? what do you say in a letter like this i mean this is all so strange to me.........coming from a small adoptive family it's a shock to find out that i come from such a big family.......also to top it all off one of my birth mother's brother's children went to the same high school as i did only a couple years apart......any advice or insight would be great........i think im just scratching the surface of how i feel......

txrnr

August 9, 2012

Congrats! It's overwhelming, isn't it? I'd sit on it a few days and see where your emotions take you. Maybe read several stories on here, it you haven't already.

That being said, there is nothing wrong with contacting whomever you feel like (of legal age). Be aware that the family may not have known about you. Also, there has been several topics lately that FB now has an additional message folder. If you aren't friends with a person, it goes into other messages. Many people aren't aware of it, and messages sit there for a bit. If you see an alternate way to contact them on FB, like an email, you may want to try that as well instead of assuming they don't want contact.

Take care!

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VancouverShar

August 16, 2012

My advice is to prepare yourself first. Reunion will bring up many emotions. The more you prepare the better. It can truly be a win/win situation. I suggest doing some reading and healing before you make contact. This site has some excellent information.

[url=http://www.adoptionhealing.com/]Adoption Healing[/url]

Very excited for you!!

Glinda659

September 8, 2012

Hello and congratulations. I am in the same boat with you. I believe I have found my birth mother just this past May 2012. It has been a roller coaster of emotions, truly many of which I did not expect especially after finding 2 pictures of her and seeing genetic similarities between us.

I have great support from my family and they all want what I want. I have been taking my time with this process as I don't want to be hasty and cause problems for my birth mother and her family or bring any undue drama and stress into my life. I do not know if she wants to see me or if her family knows about me hence I remain unsure how to begin contact. This is why I re-joined this website. It feels strange to know so much about her life and she knows nothing about me. I am ready if she does not wish to make contact just as I am ready to do so if she is.

Best of Luck to you Kitchener Guy, it seems like everything you are experiencing is normal and right on track.

Burkhart69

October 4, 2012

OMG!!! I dont even know you and I'm so happy for you. All you can do is ask. I found a person or two on facebook and sent a message. I just said how I feel and I was just looking and would like to know if you know this person. I have not gotten a message back....but I wont give up my search. I was in foster care for the first 9 months of my life and Catholic Charities is where I came from. We all have to remember back then 1969 or before family sent there daughters to another state to give birth if the were unwed mothers or young. So I might be looking in the wrong state. There is a ton of people with the same name. Good luck and keep us updated.... I am soooo happy for you

butterfly923

October 7, 2012

kitchener_guy - I see that you posted this in August - have you attempted to contact her yet? I am also in the same situation and am just not sure how to approach this and am hoping you could enlighten me :)