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We're getting nervous. TPR trial is set for later this week. FD's CW has never had a case go to TPR, and she's been doing this almost 10 years - everyone has either RU'd or parents have signed over rights voluntarily. It looks like an air-tight case at this point. The bios have even made comments themselves acknowledging that they know what's coming.
So, why drag everyone through the court case - especially since it looks like they're just going to have every bad deed thrown in their faces? Is it just in the hopes of one day being able to tell FD that "we fought for you"? Because if so, "we fought for you, we just weren't willing to give some aspects of our life that were bad for us and you up, in order to keep you in our lives" would be more appropriate.
Its just so frustrating to me how some people think (or don't) about what they are doing when it comes to children. They don't see how "we never hurt her" is actually "she hasn't been damaged enough by what we've done YET, so why would the state want to be proactive when we continue to put her in harms way with our choice of lifestyle."
I guess I'm just venting some of this trial stress, and wanting someone who has been through this TPR process in our state to tell me what I can expect. Other than being told "it might be really long" and "expect continuances", we don't know much.
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My family went through this in October in Missouri. We went fully expecting a trial and both parents surprised the workers and signed away rights that day. Our supervisor told us that 9 times out of 10 parents will sign away rights before the trial because they don't want all their dirty laundry aired. After two long years, we are adopting our siblings next month!
To sum it up, it all has actually been pretty easy. They told us if she had fought the case would have been air-tight. But if she had appealed we would have been looking at a year. Trust me, they have ways of putting the pressure on them. Hope to hear an update!
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Thank you for your response!
TPR trial was set for yesterday. As in your experience, FD's parents both signed their surrender papers just minutes before court started. We are so thankful that they didn't decide to try and draw it out. From their comments over the past few weeks, they realized it was a no-win on their side anyway.
It is such a relief to have that portion of the process finished. We have the adoption staffing scheduled for later this month. After all the back-and-forth, FD's new adoption case worker told us that she is NOT going to recruit other families (foster cw got it mixed up), so we are likely the only ones stepping forward for staffing.
I have to go edit my signature now...
Thank you!! We're still pretty excited about it.
We're hoping adoption will be early in 2013... they already had a review hearing for FD set for March, it would be nice if we could use that date for the adoption instead. I believe its the same judge, but I don't know if they set aside specific times for adoption only. Definitely need to be getting some more info from FD's new adoption worker ASAP...
MommaTina
Thank you!! We're still pretty excited about it.
We're hoping adoption will be early in 2013... they already had a review hearing for FD set for March, it would be nice if we could use that date for the adoption instead. I believe its the same judge, but I don't know if they set aside specific times for adoption only. Definitely need to be getting some more info from FD's new adoption worker ASAP...
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It wouldn't surprise me for it to take longer, just about everything else has. We've just been hearing from the workers around the case that it "shouldn't be much longer" until she is ours. The adoption staffing (where DFS picks their recommended family) is set for December 21st, and they've indicated both that we are the only people they are speaking with, and we should have their decision that day. We are already homestudy-approved through the state for adoption, so I am thinking that we just need to get a lawyer, and as quickly as that lawyer can get a court date set (this is the LONG wait possibly), we can adopt... but, I'm a first-timer for all of this, and have been wrong before with my assumptions.
FD's new adoption worker was out of the office the end of last week, and not due back in until tomorrow, so hopefully I can start getting some questions answered more concretely.