being married to an adoptee

You also mentioned that it is like he is comfortable where he is at, in regards to you trying to find help for him. Being comfortable = safe, or a perceived notion of safe, but it does not necessarily mean happy. Confronting your issues and dealing with them is scary, itҒs easier to ignore them and pretend like they dont exist. When you do confront them, you might not feel ғsafe so to speak, but it is empowering and very much worth it. Taking that leap from denial to confrontation can be extremely difficult to do.