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My mother-in-law's companion is dying of cancer (he's been a part of their family for over 30 years). He's a quiet, private man who I enjoy talking with and I am sad that he has to suffer this way. All of my husband's family members (siblings) are understandably in a great state of grief (I've lost a lot of afamily to cancer) but I feel nothing. And my husband has admitted that he does not feel as his siblings do either (he loves this man who was like a step-father, but my husband has always been extremely loyal to his dad who passed away 11 years ago). I don't know why I should care what my in-laws think but I do. I know they are wondering why we haven't visited though they have been there often (as has the families of other in-laws - ones who also married into the family like I did). And if and when the time comes I know they will be looking at my lack of emotions and begin to wonder. For many deaths of loved ones in the past I barely cried (the older I get and/or the older the one who has passed, the less crying I have felt). Is this an adoptee thing or is it just a gmarie quirck? When it comes to the big issues I have a poker face, when it comes to things that are petty I am an emotional mess at times. Can this ever change? And if so, how?
I am the same way and always have been. I don't think its an adoptee thing, although I have honestly never thought about it before. I personally am not a people person and I have strong faith so I just Sony see the use in crying about it.
But if you just don't feel like your going to be brought to tears then as long as you tell them that you are going to miss his conversations and such there isn't much they can do. You are just not that kind of an emotional person and they can get over it. It's not like you are laughing or being rude or anything.
Good luck
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