Advertisements
Our 15 yr old came home last month after over 18 months in rtc and tfc. Everyone with the agency the tfc was with thought he came so far in his treatment. we just got the last update to his service plan to sign which says he accomplished all his goals. I wish. Just like I knew would happen he is having a rough transition home. He is back to running away--even taking off from school something he has never done in the past. He is stealing again. Today was the worse-he took over$70 from my backpack. I didnt know and he asked me to go for a walk and checked his pockets first because he was acting like something was up. He went to a store and bought a phone and a phone card(he cannot have a phone because of his obsession with porn and he texts inappropriate things to people(he tried texting someone on his brothers phone saying he was 21 and wanted to meet them when he was 13)) I have the phone and some of the money. I guess now I have to keep my backpack locked in my room. Of course this will make it harder on me because our room is on the second floor and I have a disability that makes walking up the stairs difficult. He found a saw in the basement and snuck it upstairs the other day and tried cutting his brothers bike lock off his brothers wardrobe wasn't quite successful but then left the saw under his brothers bureau and must have done it after his bath because his brother knew something was wrong because he said his floor was all wet. He is lying all the time again and when I told him our trust in him is going backwards he said he doesn't care. When we searched his room the other day we found a porn magazine and some pictures. Of course he said he found them in his brothers room. The obsession with porn was never dealt with at either place because they didn't see it. It is starting to be like it was before and I just don't know what to do. We knew he would have a rough time with transition home and back to home school district esp with so little time in year . Just don't want it to come to as bad as it was. He is doing most of these things when dad is working just like before. He also doesn't like his older brother has a girlfriend and thinks he should. That is definitely not happening.
Sorry it is so long and I am rambling just feeling frustrated. He seems to think it should all be about him all the time and forgets he has 3 brothers.
Like
Share
This sure sounds hard, so very difficult to cope with. I wonder if there's a possibility your husband could put a lock on a cupboard or something downstairs that you could lock your backpack in? Something that would be difficult for him to break into? Of course there are no easy solutions. I've read many times that some children have so much damage early on that it's difficult for them ever to live in a family, but they can "succeed" when in a group home or institutional setting. I'm sure you all have hopes that he will succeed at home, but perhaps he won't. Sad!
Advertisements
Is it possible to have any of those kinds of services come into your home and do some work? Often times kids behave better when they are in those places because the temptations are not readily available. You would think these people would figure that out by now that it isn't always going to "fix things" when they are not actually in the setting to demonstrate the level of the issue.
Is it possible to cut down his free time and just make sure that someone is around constantly keeping an eye on him? I know it's hard because he's 15, but it might be the best choice so that he can't get away with as much.
Good Luck and I hope things start working out better for you guys!
It got worse. He wrote a suicide note yesterday so had to go to er to get evaluated. After 4 hours he was sent home with the suggestion of more services but he already has family based. Then this morning he refused to go to school. Finally went at lunch time.He seems to want to be hospitalized because it is easier for him.