matching w/ an adoptive family

I don't know if you ever "just know." Adoptive parents put their best foot forward. Most want to be parents - whether for the first time or, like in our case, a 6th. :) I don't think there are very many "creepers" out there willing to go through a very invasive home study, plus shell out TENS of thousands of dollars to do anything less than their best job of parenting your child. You may "click" with the first one, or they may be too mushy-gushy. It is your baby and your decision. Best wishes!!

I'm trying to pick parents now too. I'm due after you though. I went the agency route and got literally a BOX of dear birthmother letters. Crazy. Skype calls with my top three this week. I'm looking for that click too. I want to like them and feel like we have something to talk about besides the baby. My counselor told me to sort out my main criteria in order of importance. And not to be afraid to ask ANYHING even if it seems a little invasive. She also told me that birthparent sadness pain is part of the process and so is potential adoptive parent disappointment. They're not responsible for my sadness and confusion; its mine to deal with. And as long as I don't agree to anything I don't mean, any disappointment they may feel about me not picking them is theirs, not mine to deal with. They'll find their baby eventually. It doesn't have to be mine.

We are looking to adopt right now, and I can tell you that the risks are spelled out to each adoptive parent early on in the process. We know that one or two conversations doesn't mean we are are picked. And we have the easy side of things, so don't worry about us! Not to say things are easy over here, but we'll manage and be just fine. ;) My bro and sis-in-law adopted 3 of their 4 children, and during their process, they had several face-to-face meetings without being picked. In the end, they got the kids that were supposed to go to their family. Finally, look for someone YOU get along with, someone you can easily converse with. If you "click" with them, it will be easier to express how you are feeling, ask the tough questions, and find a good compromise on all the issues that arise with adoption. If YOU like them, your baby will too! Good luck!

Have you found a family for your baby yet? We have just started looking into the adoption process, but we are in the Chicago area (suburbs). We have one college age daughter and now that we are financially secure looking to adopt a child. My husband, Paul, 43 is a Sr. Director (Computer engineer) and I, 41 am a part-time architect/interior designer. I have always wanted to adopt a child (I was adopted by my aunt and uncle ,due to my mothers death when I was 2 weeks old). I don't think I would have had such a great upbringing if I didn't have full access to my biological mom's family as well (I was adopted by my biological dad's brother-so one side of the family stayed the same).

I'm sorry you are having a tough time :(

Hi, I can fully relate to you. I gave my child up for open adoption when she was one. I kept contact with her and never missed any event in her life. We are now on the wanting to have an adoption. If you want to talk pm me.

I'm pretty sure that her due date OCTOBER 14th 2013 has come and gone... Kind regards,Dickons

adoptive parents should be aware that there are different levels of risk with both ... [url=http://carrentalmarket.co.nz/]http://carrentalmarket.co.nz/how-to-get-maximum-benefits-from-the-car-rental-christchurch/[/url]

Her due date has past but I feel that this is still a relevant thread for others who might be in her situation later.

I'm sure it's very different now with many social media outlets and more truly open adoption options available than in 1991.I was still with my girlfriend, and we spent hours at the adoption agency going through lots and lots of family albums. The pictures showed the prospective parents in many different situations, but as others posted, the desire is to show a very filtered, ultra-positive image.We scheduled some interviews and there were a few maybe's, and several definitely no's. The last couple we interviewed, we definitely clicked with. It was very apparent that they had tried to conceive in every possible way, but were unable to do so. You could read the pain on their face, both on the husband and the wife. You could tell that they were very committed to becoming parents, but it never came across as desperate - just an honest, wholesome desire to be good parents. That really sold me. Other factors were important like careers, education, size of extended family, experience with young children, hopes and dreams for the future, etc.At the same time, I was 19, and I honestly don't know if I would make the same choice after one meeting if I had to choose today (of course, today, I would not be choosing adoption, so it's all relative). I was fortunate to be with my girlfriend and able to participate in the process. I think it that must take a lot of the pressure off if your partner is willing to help out.

I'm sure it's very different now with many social media outlets and more truly open adoption options available than in 1991. I was still with my girlfriend, and we spent hours at the adoption agency going through lots and lots of family albums. The pictures showed the prospective parents in many different situations, but as others posted, the desire is to show a very filtered, ultra-positive image. We scheduled some interviews and there were a few maybe's, and several definitely no's. The last couple we interviewed, we definitely clicked with. It was very apparent that they had tried to conceive in every possible way, but were unable to do so. You could read the pain on their face, both on the husband and the wife. You could tell that they were very committed to becoming parents, but it never came across as desperate - just an honest, wholesome desire to be good parents. That really sold me. Other factors were important like careers, education, size of extended family, experience with young children, hopes and dreams for the future, etc. At the same time, I was 19, and I honestly don't know if I would make the same choice after one meeting if I had to choose today (of course, today, I would not be choosing adoption, so it's all relative). I was fortunate to be with my girlfriend and able to participate in the process. I think it that must take a lot of the pressure off if your partner is willing to help out.