Open to Closed?

Has anyone here gone from an open adoption to closed? Whose choice was it? I am trying to process some feelings I have right now. We had a super open adoption with our sons birthmother. It was very open for a few years. We had about 4 visits a year, and then I would see her without my son a few times a year too. She sometimes went through stages where she did not want to see him because itҒs too hard. She actually hasnt seen him in a year. We also talked on the phone and texted a few times a week. I became her best friend. In some ways it was good because she needed a good role model but in hind sight I am not sure how healthy it was for either of us to be THAT close. She was always very honest about her grief which was hard to hear sometimes, but I listened and tried to be supportive. A few months ago it just got to be too much for me. SheҒd call me and tell me how much she misses him, that she sometimes regrets her decision, some days it felt like it would be easier to be dead than deal with this. I just listened, tried to be supportive, etc. It was HARD! Finally, I told her I needed some space for a month or 2. She got really upset which I understood, but I really just needed some space. I was on emotional overload! We didnt talk for 2 months and we saw each other a few days ago. It was just us, my son wasnҒt there. She didnt want to see him. She told me that she was so upset with me for pulling away and that it felt like losing her best friend. She also told me that the past 2 months have been ғfreeing and not talking to me almost daily was a good thing. She didnԒt want to see my son because she was worried it would set her back and shes been making progress. Then she dropped a bomb on me. She said she wanted to close the adoption. She said she felt like sheҒs finally beginning to heal, she is moving and getting a new job where no one will ever know she had a baby, and she just wants a fresh start. I have so many emotions. I feel a sense of relief in some ways. The more I reflect on how open it was, the more I see that I feel like there was a constant reminder to me that my son was adopted. I dont want to deny heҒs adopted but feel like it shouldnt DEFINE him either. Does that makes sense? There was a constant reminder to me that my joy was someone elseҒs grief. I lived with that daily. Its hard. I feel sad for her. I know itҒs what she wants. But it still makes me feel sad. Like maybe we didnt set boundaries early on and that led to this. Mostly I feel sad and worried for my son. I hope he doesnҒt want to have a relationship and feel rejected. He has not seen her in a year (her choice) and has not asked. Lots of emotions going on and just wondering if anyone else has had a similar experience?