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I have a 22 y.o. daughter who is DD. Last night she had some money and she wanted to buy a drink and a snack for herself. She asked if I would take her to the local dollar store-(where we frequently go)- so she could get some stuff. I took her--while we were leaving the cashier asked my daughter how old she was. L told her that she was 22---the cashier asked her if she was working. L said no. The cashier said 'well why not??!!' I blurted out that L has special needs. The cashier said 'no you don't!" L smiled and said, 'yeah, I do'.
After we left I felt like such a total *** for blurting that out to someone we don't even know. While we see this person often when we go in the store we don't know her and couldn't even tell you her name. I felt like such a jerk for just blurting that out to someone who I don't know in front of my daughter. My daughter knows she is different but I have always been careful recognize and appreciate her ABILITIES rather than her disability.
I feel like a crappy mom every time I think about me and my big mouth. I wish I had just kept my mouth shut and moved on.:mad:
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Tiger,
Give yourself a pass on this one, there wasn't an intent to hurt, it was spontaneous and it was to a cashier she knows. You never know, there could be a good job she could do at the store one day, and maybe, they will keep your daughter in mind in case one comes up. I don't know what your daughters special needs are but where I shop there is a young man who works there, has for years, and has special needs and is an asset.
Kind regards,
Dickons
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Chalk it up as a lesson to the clerk to maybe learn that no all disabilities are visible. It may not have been the way you wanted to present it, but maybe it will be a positive. Have a conversation with your DD and apologize for saying something impulsively. Bet she hasn't ever done that!
I agree that you need to give yourself a break on this one.
Yeah, it wasn't the best to blurt that out, but the clerk was being intrusive and the situation was awkward to begin with. It's none of her business why your daughter isn't working or her place to disbelieve your daughter having special needs, and her questioning put pressure on the situation that shouldn't have been there.
I think you should just give your daughter an apology for sharing that information - maybe take it as an opportunity to reevaluate how much she wants you to share in similar situations just to make sure you're on the same page - and then move on.
In the grand scheme of things, you didn't do anything terrible, so I don't think you need to be harsh with yourself over one minor misstep.