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So I think I would have this down more if I had a long term placement, but so far, the only AA children I've had have been respite (4 total). What is a good, generic moisturizer for hair? I've been using coconut oil - cheap, safe and it makes it really easy to do hair, but when I had a young toddler, it went south and stained lots of things. I'm looking for something that won't stain, but will still make it easy to do hair (boys, so I corn row), and will help protect the hair.
Also, talk to me about socially acceptable. I've had two girlish looking (facial structure) boys come with braids. The only culture I've ever seen with boys braided like it is Native Americans. They fall out easily (1-2 days) and need redone. Is this a culturally acceptable style or just foster parents fed up with not being able to cut their hair and doing something easy? Both came from AA foster families. I am not AA, so I was just curious.
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Coconut oil is good and so is BB Oil Moisturizer (white bottle pink letters). Usually found at Wal-Mart. This works for boys and girls. For younger kiddos, regular baby lotion or a combo of baby lotion and baby oil works well to keep the hair manageable and keeps it from drying out.
On the other questions, braids are acceptable for AA boys. Yes it is seen on a lot of NA boys for cultural reason but AA boys are put in braids to keep their hair from looking wild. My so (biracial) wore braids frequently until he was 4y/o and then he asked for a haircut to look more like a boy. Braids are fine, what I am not a fan of is multiple ponytails on AA boys ( I have seen quite a few), One is acceptable, multiple is not.
Good luck with your hair journey. You could also find a hair dresser that does AA children's hair and ask for pointers (don't be shy), I am AA and the worse thing to see is an AA child looking like their care giver (AA or not) does not care to make them look presentable. When I get kids whose hair I am not used to dealing with, I make sure to reach out to people I know that can guide me, that includes AA children because I am horrible at doing my own hair so I try not to mess up a child's hair who's parents will see them and complain.
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Momtastic -
two questions:
1) How do you keep the oil from getting all over, especially clothes? Maybe I'm doing too much, but it is thirsty hair.
2) When you say one and multiple ponytails, did you mean braids? I had one come with a single braid and one come with pigtail like braids. The single braid fell out so I corn rowed it, the multiple one did not so I just redid the ends when they looked frayed.
I understand what you mean by reaching out, but with just 2-4 days with a kid, I don't always have time to find out how to do their hair 'right'. It would be easier with a full-time placement.
JLW77 -
To keep the oil off of things like pillow cases and such, tie the hair in a scarf. Try using a small amount, maybe a nickel to quarter size, depending on the amount of hair. They also make gel baby oil now, maybe that will work better.
It is hard to judge on thirsty hair because by the time you have gotten past that brittle or dry phase you have used half the bottle -lol. Just keep it minimal. The lotion is great, just make sure you don't reach the point where the hair is turning white - that's too much.
The comment about ponytails - I actually meant multiple ponytails like you would see on a little girl. I have put my son's hair into a single ponytail but never multiple ponytails. Braids are fine, any type (single or cornrows). Pigtail like braids with rubber bands at the base are ponytails in my book but If the childs parent or foster parent did it I would just freshen up the braids since they are not full fosters in your home. Good luck to you.