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There's no sub forum that matches my question. I'll start here. Please feel free to move
Tomorrow is my 30th wedding anniversary. A couple days later is the 5th anniversary of finalizing my DD's adoption.
A few year's back, we morphed these two events into "family anniversary" - we try to celebrate being together instead of the adoption itself (thanks to some a.com advice.. while it might be a day of celebration for us parent's, its a mixed bag for the adoptee).
J has a visit with her BM today (coincidentally... its been delayed since April and this was one of a few free days left his summer). I'm hoping it goes well
I'm trying not to show my excitement (this year, she'll pass the milestone of being a "C" for more time than a "B".. we already passed the milestone of her living with us more than "not". ). In my head, I totally get it. I've seen her mourn for her other life. But.. in my heart.. I'm so "over the moon" happy to share my life with her. kwim?
So, APs.. how do you balance the big days, while respecting your child's past life?
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update: Today is the 5th anniversary of our Adoption Finalization
On Sunday, I told her it was dada's and my 30th wedding anniversary. She responded, "so that means our adoption anniversary is coming up). I confirmed that on Weds, she will have been a C for 5 years... and we moved on
Yesterday we had 1 hour where we'd all be in one place (I worked, B&J were going to an Ariana Grande concert..). So we went out for a catch up dinner. No reference to the adoption specifically. We had a wonderful time, hearing all about J's sleepover.
She seemed (more than usual) happy to be out with her family - super chatty, all smiles
This morning, I texted her a "have a great day".. She responded with "thank you and happy adoption anniversary"
I replied with "very happy. i love you forever. Its an honor to be your mom"
She replied with "i know and i love you forever too"
Tonight, B is working s w'e'll probably do ice cream for supper and then set up ladderball
Last update on August 5, 6:45 am by wcurry66.
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