Becoming Disillusioned with the Process :(

: : hello. You are describing a very familiar scenario for most people adopting through state foster care. I think the important distinction is how your state does their "foster to adopt" program. For example, my state does straight foster care (no adoption) or only foster to adopt a child that is already legally free and available to adopt and so the "fostering" is really just the first 6-9 months trial period to be sure it is the right fit before legal adoption. It sounds like your state does it differently and I've read about that on this forum a lot. Other states require you to be a "fostering resource" to any child in need regardless of whether or not you can adopt the child in the end or they are returned to bio family. The "adopt" part of that type of program is really just that you would get "preference" if the child you foster becomes legally free. I empathize with those who are in a program like this. I honestly don't think I'd be emotionally or mentally able to endure that process - especially if attached to the child - but then again, my adoption through the state foster care system took 2 years and people said the same thing about me (how could you be that patient and strong!?). Hang in there ... I know this process isn't for the faint of heart. I'm thinking positive thoughts for you that the right path for your journey will become clear. : :