Is it worth it??

There is a lady who is a frequent poster on this forum, her name is Melissa but she posts under the name "Decision" (formerly A-Mother's-Love). She lives in Canada and is a Search Angel specializing in Canadian adoptions. Before you shell out 450 bucks, you might want to contact her and see if she can help. She seems like a very nice person and I've seen her offering to help others with Canadian searches, so maybe she can help you too. Why don't you P.M. her and ask? Sincerely, ~Sharon

Thank you so much for the tip, I really appreciate it. I have been searching for my sister for a couple of years with no luck, and batshaw is a pain in the ... Anyway thanks again. Moogie

What can I say. You are right when you say that they are impossible to work with. I am in a legal fight with them as they have misrepresented themselves to me on many fronts, I guess this could be interpreted as misrepresentation of the truth. I can't trust a system that repeatedly lies to me and other over and over again. Interested in helping?

Hi Mary, I am not a search angel, but recently found my friend's bmom for her- at her request, of course. Finding a sibling is somewhat harder than finding a bmom, but I can make a suggestion: Is Donna margaret Hancox her birthname? If so, I would contact ParentFinders Nova Scotia chapter. ParentFinders Montreal gave me my friend's bmom's name (She was born in Montreal in the 60's) and they may have some sort of "reverse look up" where they can type in the baby's name at birth and then find more info on the adoption. Also, have you registered that name on all the registries, including the sibling search? Please pm me if you need more info or if I can help you in any way. Best of luck, Kelly

Parentsfinder uses Batshaw's data base. Look. Kellster may want to genuinly help but I so NO new idea of search options. We should just keep asking Batshaw to do the search and have them take the government to task regarding this issue. After all Batshaw Youth and Family does not mention that they are here to help us fight the government to open our files. You would thing thay do as they have 10 lawyers , no real social workers, no real psychologists and not one psychiatrist. They even had the nerve in my none iding info to refer to my bio parents in very negative term...terms reserved to diagnostic professionals. Kellster. Tell us something new. This is getting really old. P.S. I may sound upset. I am. Kellster is wasting time and energy and getting people's hopes up. Who is your friens. Produce this person, have them tell us THEIR story. You'd think that they would be happy to sing your praises!!!

Stephen, I am sorry that you are having such a difficult time. I don't know your story, but it must be bad for you to be this upset. My friend lives in the U.S. and finds it too stressful to get involved in websites- which is why I offered to do the searching for her. I am not looking for anyone to sing my praises. I do not do this for a living and have only helped my one friend. I am not wasting anyone's time or energy, I am just sharing with others what worked in OUR case. The Might's City Directories are an excellent search tool that many people may not know about. I am very curious to know how you know that ParentFinders uses Batshaw's database? When I asked, the ParentFinders volunteer said that she could not reveal her sources, which of course, I understood. All I can say is that ParentFinders gave ME the info we needed and that it DID allow US my friend's bmom's name and we were able to confirm it. I hope things work out for you, Stephen. I am still happy to answer questions about how I did my friend's search for anyone who is interested. Kelly

To begin with Kelly, Elizabeth returned my call regarding this matter and when I asked her if she cross references data bases with Batshaw she said yes...no big mystery. I am not mad, just frustrated by going in circles with pople who claim to be things that they are not and at this point by people who make unsuported claims about what they have done. Please have your friend post her story with a little evidence to back it up and maybe this might make a little more sense to me. Thanks. P.S. Until Kellster does any of the above I would sugest that no matter how desperate you are to find your family to refrain from giving and money

O.K. A name....did you find the person?

Stephen, I do not feel the need to "prove" anything to anyone. I have told the story and I realize that you are in such a state that you don't even take the time to READ what is posted. Since you are so interested in the story, I will repeat it for you: we contacted my friend's bmom BY MAIL and gave her all of our contact info. She CALLED US ON THE PHONE to say-in a very nasty way- that she did not want us to contact her again. That is the whole story. So, I don't know why you accused me of "covering up" some meeting that took place- they never met!! Next time, go back and actually read the post thoroughly-check your facts before you accuse people of lying. Furthermore, I do not know where you are getting your ludicrous claim that there is anything in this for me. A wolf in sheep's clothing?????? All I did was recommend a volume of city directories-similar to phone books, but containing more detailed info- that exist for most Canadian cities. I am not sure why you are directing this anger at me. Once again, if you READ MY POSTS, you will see that I HAVE NEVER OFFERED ANY SERVICE, so what would I ask for money for??? When I was searching. total strangers VOLUNTARILY went to the library and did look-ups for me in Ontario (where my friend's adoption was finalized) and Quebec. I was deeply TOUCHED by their willingness to help a total stranger, never suspicious and nasty as you have been to me for no reason at all. How sad for you that you cannot believe that some of us are happy to just pass on a piece of information (that some other kind person was kind enough to pass along to me when I needed it) and expect nothing in return. I will still give anyone who asks the names of all the nice people who helped me- also with nothing in it for them - when I needed it. Best of luck to you. Kelly

There are many great resources out there. Many at a cost and some are maned by volunteers. I have beeen taking advantage of both avenues. The results has not been forthcoming as I have yet to get some real iding info on my biological family. Batshaqw is still claiming to be at the mercy of the government, yet they do nothing to try and get the government to do anything. Maybe if organizations like Batshaw refrained from commenting about our psychological well being ( I asume in order to scare a searching family member off) there may be more reunions, happy reunions. Thanks

O.K.

To moogie272002 Did you say your sister was born in Halifax? Dec 1 1960? Please contact me if this is correct. dmmacdougall@shaw.ca To anyone searching in Canada...gads do not pay that ridiculous sum of money. I know many search angels that will help you if not search for you then guide you in your search. there are many web based sites for Canada to help you find what you are looking for I am in BC but have helped many people across Canada, and have many resources that can help you. If anyone needs advice on how to search in Canada let me know and I will guide you to a search angel if not help you myself Hugs Melissa

I was really lucky when I was searching for my friend's bmom. Total strangers both here and in Ontario went out of their way to help me. Two people went to their local libraries to do look-ups for me and a wonderful reference librarian referred me to the Might's Directories, which ultimately allowed us to confirm that we had the right person and provided the bmom's family members' names. I am happy to "pay it forward". Sad that some people cannot fathom that some of us are just happy to help. Kelly

I too was able to locate my birth-mom after a day in the Vancouver public library(city directories list all adults by address and profession). I was able to use the non-identifying info. to guide me but would never have succeeded without my birth-mother's name....I only had that as an"angel" helped me and asked for nothing in return, (the only thing I can say is DO register at the free online sites). But I would never have found her without the name which of course we do not have access to in Quebec. What I am trying to say is that perhaps sometimes one needs pay Batshaw the $450 because there is no other course of action. Perhaps I misunderstood but don't they return atleast half that sum if the search is unsuccessful? My trip to Vancouver from the interior of BC, where I now live, cost at least that much. I am not advocating that we do not protest and push for legislation to change the laws around adoption records, but there are many diverse ways to reach a goal.

I did not read all of the post, but I did see one were someone indicated parent finders uses Bradshaw data bases...I am certain that every affiliation that deals in search and reunion has access to another's data base...I do and I am not truly affiliated with anyone. So many search posts get lost in the not so little system. If everyone had their own data base and never checked others...trust me there would be allot more searchee's than there are now. Quebec and Ontario are one of the most difficult to obtain information without paying through the nose...BUT if you are willing to spend quality time using your fingers and ears then you will in the end be rewarded. It only takes one persons voice to travel the length of Canada and touch one million hearts. those one million hearts have fingers and ears, before you know it what you were looking for is right before your eyes. It is horrendous that the government does not hand our information to us on silver platters...THAT is how it should happen. Politicians are not known for their caring attitudes they are known for how much money they can squeeze out of one individual. My fingers and ears never tire, they are always open and searching. Hugs Melissa