Adopting a baby through the state

In my experience, they'll place foster kids, especially younger ones, with parents who perfer to foster but might adopt. If a baby is removed from the mom, there is a significant time period the parents have to regain custody. They want parents who will help with that. But, if the child cannot return home, it is better for the child to remain with the foster family it has been bonding with. Parents who foster/adopt simply to adopt are more likely not to help with the reunification because they want the child(I didn't say everyone). Going into this with the attitude you are, you're more likely to end up with plenty of children to adopt plus help many return home. I hope that answered your question.

my experience has been similar, it is very rare that when a child is placed in foster care, that they have any idea what the long term plan is. typically reunification is the first goal. it is usaually not for several months and/or years that the child is in foster care that the plan becomes termination of rights, and at that point it is typically in the best interest of the child to be adopted by their foster family. if the foster family cannot adopt the child, then those children are place with parents who only want to adopt, not take a chance with fostering. i hope this is clear. i think i am stating this confusingly?

Thank you so much for answering and understanding my question! I never really looked at it that way, that if the child becomes free for adoption they may want them to go to where they are most comfortable first. I really appreciate your replys! Thanks again!

because I have lived it. It really depends on the state you live in. I live in Texas and CPS has one year to finalize the parental rights. We Foster but at the same time are looking for an adoption. The state loves foster/adopt families. We are currently adopting 4 children from foster care. We always had a rule that we only took siblings ...we always wanted the kids to stay together. I've had the baby since he was 4 weeks old. Toward the end we started taking "low risk kids". In Texas, "low risk kids" are children that are a low risk for the foster parents. It basically mean that most likely they will go into adoption. It is a lot easier to adopt sibling groups than single children due to the fact that most of the kids in state care have siblings and the courts and state does not want to split them up and I agree with them. Good luck.....Lisa

We have fostered since 1996, but only wanted to adopt in the beginning. No children were placed with us until we decided to foster. We were told we needed experience with special needs children before we would get an adoption placement. My husband adopted my daughter from another relationship so we had one child. That did not make a difference. It was very difficult and time consuming because our worker did not give us all the facts at the time. Do not take any child they call you on....make sure it is a match for your family. It took 1 1/2 yrs. to get our first foster children, twins. The boy was violent and aggressive, the girl was wonderful. They were only 6 yrs. but we were not prepared to physically restain the boy (per psychiatric orders) every night because his medicine was not right. Ask lots of questions!!!! We have successfully adopted from the state 3 times and finally received a baby 1 1/2 yrs ago who we are adopting. If you want only babies, tell them that. There are lots of babies in foster care now than ever before. If a TPR was done on the baby's siblings than you want that baby to foster. Unless of course family comes forward. Good luck. There is so much "red tape", but if it suppose to work it will! Deb

you never do know how the card are going to be delt. I foster parented for 5 years and did in fact adopt 2 of my foster children. I also ended up with a psycho SW (long story) It is now better then before, almost all states are actually enforcing the Child Protection Act of 1997 and TPR b-parents rights after the first 16 months thus freeing the child for adoption and not making the children grow up in foster care drift. But this is not always the case. I know of at least one set of parents who fostered for 7 years here local and another for 5 years who never did have a child placed with them who became legally free and they both were fostering to adopt, and there are always the b=relativies who pop up out of no where 2 year after the child has been living with you. Hey, but if you want to foster, go for it-- Good Luck It is not easy, School systems, parent visits, therapy, yucky SWs, your home is open to the world, etc... About 80% of foster parents who foster parent over 3 years also have at least one child abuse investiation on them (b-ps love to make reports, and man what out if you PO a SW) I just think people should know what they are getting into. In VA they even have a task force called FASTS or something to help keep foster parents after they are invesigated for abuse or neglect because they are so common. It is the hardest thing to do to turn your little baby over to a drunk, dirty, smelly, lice infected b-parent for a visit (BUT, I guess if I did not go through all that pain, I would not have my GIFTS from God now, so what can I really say) On the up side, fostering really helps you get to know your kids and you have all that extra time of being part of their lives. If you have the stomach for it, then the kids really need you.

Rinda, I love how blunt you are about the subject. I guess we are lucky that we haven't had a report. But, you are so right about what we go through as foster/adoptive parents only to find that someone from the family pops up and wants the child. We actually "intervened" in the court system to keep and adopt our foster baby. We get to adopt him though. But, if you mess with a social worker, watch out!! There are wonderful points of being there for the kids. Your house is wide open for any kind of criticism, be careful who you let in the door!! HA! Make sure you are dedicated enough to stick with it. Deb