New! Any help/advice appreciated...

We are in the process of adopting a 6 year old girl from Pennsylvania (we are from Maryland). She is coming to live with us the end of this month. Adoption of a child from the foster care system is the most inexpensive way to go and there are so many children out there needing your love. Our daughter has emotional and learning disabilities (but nothing we can't handle). You are in control of what disabilities you feel you can accept. Contact your local Social Services for information. It took us 8 months from the time of the homestudy being complete to placement.

We are so new to this, all perspectives, etc will be really helpful to us. Thanks Sharel

I went through a California facilitator it took me 1 year and 30 days to get my wonderful healthy daughter, I don't know if they still do gender specific. I decided not to do a PA adoption because the birthparents have 6 months to change their minds and CA is 72 hours if they both sign the adoption . If you are interested email me and I will give you the information about this facilitator. This facilitator works very hard to get babies. When I first started I called many PA agencies and found out it takes too long to get a baby or the children are 3 or 4 years old..

While that does sound like an effective method for getting a young daughter, we just don't have the financial resources to work outside of the state system. Congrats on your little girl. How old is she? Sharel

my daughter is 14 months old on june 3rd. Your right it is very expensive. I don't think we could afford another adoption.

Good for you for deciding to adopt! My husband and I already had 3 sons(bio) when we decided that we would like to become foster parents with the hopes of adopting a little girl.We got our license July 13,1999 and 2 days later got a call from the county agency to go pick up a 7 month old baby boy.Today that 7 month old baby boy is now our very energetic 4 1/2 year old son!The adoption process cost us nothing,it was paid for entirely by the agency.We found out that if we would have had to pay for everything it would have cost us in eccess of $15,000.00.The best way to adopt is to become foster parents first,especially if money is tight yet you still want to adopt.The down side with becoming foster parents is that you take the risk of becoming very attached to a child and having that child returned to the parents or removed for adoption by another family.Luckily with our little guy,everything went our way from the very beginning.We adopted him on April 20,2001.I do know that just being put on a waiting to adopt list is long and it can take years before you get a child-even though there are thousands of children in the state waiting to be adopted.In the 2 years since we adopted our son,there have been at least 7 other adoptions in just our town alone and they were all foster care placements first.Before our sons adoption it had been 5 years since the previous adoption.Since our sons adoption we have given up being foster parents.With 4 sons(14,12,10 and 4) I just didn't have the time or energy to deal with it anymore.I just wanted to devote my time to my children and enjoy my little Calvin while he is still little.Good luck in your future adoption endeavors!

Did you go through lifetime in Sacramento Ca. We did and had a wonderful experience with them. Our son is now 2 1/2 we got him the same day he was born. Only waited 3 months.

We went through Unique Adoptions in( I think Wildomar Ca). I got my daughter the same day she was born. We had a great experience with them...

We've adopted four kids from the county. The advice I have for you is as fallows: 1. Ask your agency what their rate for children being sucessfully adopted is. If their sucess rate is not that great (in CO) you can chose any county to work with. Trust me some are better than others. 2. Listen....When you go in to hear about a child you will be VERY excited but listen carefully and maybe even tape record the conversation for future reference. You will get much background information, it will be valuable to you later when your child has questions. Also to you as you make your decision as to wether that child is right for you. 3. Ask questions. Do not worry about how long the interveiw takes. Ask ANYTHING you want to before commiting to a child. Ask if you can talk to the childs foster parent (they usually have more info than the county as to the child's behavior). 4. Older children experience a "honeymoon" phase. Those with attachment disorder can charm your pant's off but it is all show it is because they are desparate for love and affection. Ask the county about the availability of an attachment specialist to help you bond with your new child. 5. Don't be suprised if you don't immediately fall head over heals for the child you are matched with sometimes it takes time (for you and the child) for love to grow. 6. Don't expect an older child to be greatful for being adopted. They just see you as another placement and are sometimes resentful for being moved again. 7. Do ask questions about subsidy and Medicaid for your child. Even if they don't bring it up ask if the child is eligible. This can be of great help if you are financially not well off. The monies can be used to benefit the child ie, alternative therapies etc. Hope this helps! Luv, Rainbow Mom

THANK YOU for all of that information!! I appreciate you taking the time to help us out so much. Sharel

Hi Sharel, First I understand where you are coming from when it comes to finance. When I looked into this I felt like money seemed to be the most important fact to some of these people. Being middle class makes it somewhat difficult to do. So after searching and research my husband and I decided to do foster. It doesn't cost you a dime. I mean yes there is a chance the child will be reunited with the birth parents, but it seems that is a risk you face in straight adoption also, and these are children that really need you. I really looked into it, and am going through the county children youth service in allegheny county. You can be specific about what you desire also. Like I told them I want infants, and if you stress that you really want to adopt they will try to place a child that they believe will not be going back home. Being the foster parents they will offer these children to you first. I am not pushing it, you have to what you feel is comfortable and suits your family. I was just giving you an option. My husband and I are just nearing the end of our classes so hopefully soon we will be helping a child that really needs us. Good Luck and if you want to talk e-mail me at alura764@attbi.com your friend in hope, Ruth

Ruth, My husband and I recently started adoption proceedings, and have chosen 4 beautiful children from Pitts?/ I have been told that Allegh. Cty drags their feet. True? I feel we may have a quicker process, seeing that their are 4 of them. < Keeping my fingers crossed and saying alot of prayers> Cheryl Has anyone ever used "Rejoice Inc" out of harrisburgh?

Ruth, We went for our first meeting yesterday. Completed the necessary paperwork, and the next step is our training which will be the third weekend of this month. I found out that we will have NO cost to us because the children are considered special needs, due to their being four of them. It is my understanding, and please do not quote me, that any of the children at adoptpakids website are special needs. We will be eligible for subsidies ( monthly income) and the children will all have medical cards. We found out yesterday that adopting an infant girl can have a long waiting process, unless you are willing to adopt biracial, etc, which it sounds you are. SWAN has been sooooo helpful, as has Rejoice! Inc, who we are going through for our training and home study. They then turn everything back over to SWAN, who will become our caseworkers. Anything else I can help you with, feel free to e-mail me ( gregzgirl99@pennswoods.net ) or post ??? here. I will pray for you, you pray for us, please. With God, all things are possible!!!!!!!!!

Nursez, Hi it is very nice to hear from you. Well we have been foster parents for 9 months now with cyf in allegheny county. We have had custody of a little boy that we got when he was 2 days old and he is going to be 9 months old very soon, we also have a 6 year old little girl that we have had custody of for 6 months. The little girl went up for adoption almost 2 weeks ago. The attorney and caseworker are working on changing the goal for the little boy. We will be adopting him. The little girl will be adopted by the family that has her little brother. We have had a total of 4 children come and go. 3 girls and one boy. The only bad part about all this is the confusion that takes place with the system. Very had to understand the reasoning behind some of the decisions made by the system. Well write me (alura764@attbi.com). Good luck, I will pray for your family. Ruth

My Dh and I used Rejoice in Harrisburg for our two adoptions. We adopted 2 boys, our first son, was 3 when he was placed with us for adoption, he is now 6yrs old. Our second son was 19mths, and he is now 3yrs old. Our second son was an out-of-state adoption, he was from Delaware. We were very happy with Rejoice and loved our caseworker!!! Both of there adoptions are final, so we don't see them accept at Xmas. I'm about to write the caseworker and give her our new address as we just moved. If you want to talk, just give send me an email: Tjarron@aol.com Terri