Marilynn Huff

I reunite families for free. I even give away donated dna tests for free to people searching for their relatives. People are required to be named parents of their own offspring and have to take care of them and of course every person deserves the support of both people who put them on this earth - its only proper to expect that of them. Husbands are automatically put as father on the birth certificates of their wives children because being married they "had access" to her around the time of conception, so unless the wife comes clean and tells the registrar that her husband is not the father, he will wind up on the hook as the father and that is called paternity fraud. It's paternity fraud even if her husband goes along with the charade willingly. That is because naming a man as father on the birth certificate of a child that is not his offspring is fraud and it also prevents the actual father from being held appropriately accountable for his child's welfare. The child is of course not only denied the father's surname but also his financial support, visitation at minimum or shared custody at maximum, legal kinship with their paternal relatives and an opportunity to know and grow up around their paternal grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, siblings and of course their father, they are denied a chance to understand their paternal family's culture and heritage. Paternity fraud, whether the husband is lied to about it or goes along willingly, places the mother's romantic relationship with her husband first and places the child's rights to financial support and a relationship with their father and paternal relatives in the dumpster. Paternity fraud requires pretending that a child is someone entirely different than who they actually are. When a mother commits paternity fraud she is loving her son or daughter conditionally, on the condition that she can pretend that the child has a different father and family than he or she really does. When a husband participates in paternity fraud with his wife he is saying I don't love my wife enough to raise this child with her as my step child but I will stay with her and raise this child if I can pretend the child is my own. He is saying I don't actually love my stepchild for who they really are I love them only for who I want to pretend them to be. He is saying I am going to prevent my stepchild from getting what they deserve from their father and from having a relationship with their paternal family in order to keep my marriage intact and I will love this other man's child conditionally only if that child pretends to be my child. I'll reject this child if they were to seek out a relationship with their father. When a person gets an NPE result on a dna test unexpectedly it is shattering to discover that they have been forced to pretend to be a whole different person than they actually are. What a joy and relief it must have been for your sister to find out that her father and her paternal siblings were excited to meet her. Your sister is probably heart broken that this DNA result is costing her a relationship with you. You are acting like you don't actually love her now that you found out she's not your father's daughter. Your whole relationship seems not to matter to you now that you know your father is not her father. It sounds like her father would have loved to have raised her but was not allowed to do so. She missed out on a childhood being raised with her siblings by her father and your mom and your dad lied to her for a real long time. Tell your father if he truly had loved your sister then he would have been willing to raise her without making her give up her father or her paternal family. Ask if he would have raised her with your mom if your mom had told the truth about whose child she was on the birth certificate. If he says yes he would have stayed and raised her no matter what her last name was, even if her father had fifty percent custody of her, then you know your dad sincerely loves her for who she is and then you should follow suit. Paternity fraud seems all noble on the surface but in reality it tries to turn a real person into a cartoon of what the mom wants in order to maintain the facade of her marriage. In your parents case the facade crumbled and they divorced, but the law held him responsible for child support for all of you and now because he paid the bills he feels entitled to the title of father. Well he made his bed when he lied about being her father when she was born, because her real father would have to have paid hundreds of dollars a month to support his daughter. That was his job, not your father's job. Love your sister and apologize about being so short sighted. Have a party where all the siblings can get together and celebrate the truth. She's totally still your sister. Your dad will just have to work out his feelings on his own.