ah, what the heck....

Here it is, my little story.... I was adopted at the age of 5 months. My adoptive mother died when I was 19 (1975). About 10 years after her death, I decided to look for my birthMom. I joined WARM. (washington adoption rights movement). Found a lot of really nice helpful people with this organization. The search was going nowhere, so I ended up doing most of it myself. I travelled wherever I needed to, to obtain records and documents related to this adoption. Many doors were closed, many people didn't like the idea of my looking for a birthparent. I managed to find names of people who knew my birthmother and talked with everyone I could. That is how I was lead to her grave. Unfortunately she had died one year after my adoptive Mom. But, she had given up another child after me. Unfortunately, no one knew his name or exact date of birth. I was told he was adopted by a retired spokane police detective and his wife. Now, as luck would have it, my cousin was married to a man whose father used to be the undersherriff in Spokane. I gave him the name of whom to contact and he talked to the lady, but she just couldn't remember the familys name. So she called a family who knew the family who adopted my brother. They called my friend and said the adoptive family of my brother doesn't want me trying to contact him in any way. They said he is fine, married and living in washington, but doesn't know he's adopted. I was never to try to contact them again. I was devestated. One family away from knowing the only blood relative (other than my own children) I have and they said "go away". Now I live with the knowledge that I have a brother "out there" somewhere and I will never be allowed to know him. Thanks for reading this.... -connie-