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Hi everyone,
I thought it was time to do a roll call for everyone here so we can see how many of us there are and where we are in the process. I will start...
We are putting in our paperwork to adopt throught LDS FS. We have done everything but finished the 50 question profile and home visit.
And you?
LBL
:)
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We have just been selected by a birthmom through LDS. Our birthmom found us on Parent Profiles. I say get your paperwork done quickly and get on parent profiles asap. We have been married 16 years and have two children ages 15 and 12 already and we were still chosen. Parent Profiles really works!
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I'm new to the forum and to adoption! DH and I have been trying to acquire siblings for DD for 10 years with no luck. Two years ago we completed homestudy/certification with LDS FS - NY agency and last year began some infertility treatments that we had been too emotionally and financially intimidated to attempt earlier. After waiting and waiting for what seemed like forever, our family started having the discussion about "do we want to withdraw from the pool of adoptive parents... we are happy as a family of 3.... there are lots of things that would be easier to do/more affordable with just the three of us... DD will be out of the house soon and then we would be raising two only children, etc...."
In late March, we had decided that we needed to pray and make a decision about whether or not to leave well enough alone and stop adoption and fertility attempts or not when we recieved a call from the agency asking if we were willing to consider placement of a special needs toddler. I told Kim that DH and I would need to discuss it but that I would call him back the next day. Ten minutes later I picked up the phone to tell him that we didn't really need to think about this - we were willing to proceed.
Maxx is about to turn 2, was 2 months premature and has some developmental delays - mostly speech and communication issues - was raised by his valiant young birth mom for first year & 1/2. Her parents took over when she decided that it would be better for both her and Maxx for him to be adopted. When we met bmom and her parents, I was so impressed at what a strong person his mom is - not completely wise or obedient at this point in her life, but strong and thoughtful. We have been here at her parents' home for 3 weeks getting to know Maxx and waiting for legal clearance to take him home to NY.
Thats our story so far.... gotta run!
It was great to hear your story, mamaluna. Maxx sounds like a really cool kid from a special birthfamily and now he'll be part of your family! I hope DD is excited about the whole idea as well. But when I read your story, I think of myself and wonder...am I bad person because I want an infant and there are certain special needs I'd rather not accept? Sometimes I get the feeling from people (both within and outside of adoption) that "beggars can't be choosers and you should take whatever child comes your way." I don't mean to demean any specific child who is older or has certain special needs. It is just that we don't have any experience as parents and we'd like to start with an infant and also certain special needs would just be very painful for me and I've had quite a lot of pain over the years with infertility and waiting for children. But is that the reason why our wait has been so long? Because God wants us to accept any child? Does that make sense? Just wondering what some of your opinions are. Thanks,L.
Hi, L. Good to meet you! Yes, DD is very excited. At present she has more patience with this little ball of energy than I do because she is staying in a seperate room here and gets to sleep all night long!
As far as being reluctant to adopt a special needs child goes, I'm really totally with you. Maxx is considered "special needs" because he was a preemie and has had some mild developmental delays, plus he is a toddler now and is at risk for attachment problems. We felt that we could handle these sorts of problems because I'm a stay at home mom and my husband is a special ed. teacher and grew up with an uncle and a sister with Down's Syndrome.
There are special needs circumatances that I know our family cope with. It would be irresponsible for me to pretend that I could deal with bigger issues, accept a child with issues and then not be able to parent that child well or have to disrupt the placement later on. Being a first time parent, you are certainly wise to wait for an infant placement with few special needs. I do have compassion for you long wait and your struggle with infertility. I know how frustrating it can be and what sort of thoughts run through your mind in the middle of the night when you are wondering why you have to wait for so long. I'll be praying for you.
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Thanks!! Is your name really Ginny? My grandma's name was Virginia and she went by Ginny, too. I loved her tons. Anyway, the pbm has been so excited about emailing us. We really like her so far.... I promised myself that I wouldn't count on things, get excited, risk my heart, etc., etc., but today I've been checking email every few hours to see if she's written. Aaaaah! I'm going crazy. I see my caseworker this Friday for a counseling session. I need some help dealing with this.Thanks again and take care,L.
As long as you are excited aboutthe "potential" of things working out, it's ok. And chances are, she clicks with you too!
I am WAY EXCITED for you. I remember the first few weeks of emailing everyday and wondering if it would all work out....and it did...and we still email and I still get just as excited to hear from her.
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Hi everyone,I am new to this LDS forum. I have been over on the Guatemala forum for months now because just brought home our Guatemalan princess in March 2006. She has been home 3 months now and we are loving it. My husband and I have considered putting our papers into LDS Family Services now and enduring the wait that we were not willing to endure before. We live in Iowa and I enjoy meeting people who are adopting so I don't feel so alone! Hilery