I have a different sort of situation

Was there some sort of contract? Or is this more like open adoption where any such agreements for future contact are not enforceable by law? Was there any agreement that the kids should know their "egg donor mom" in the future?Are the questions she posts ones that make you worry about the kids' health or welfare?

Originally Posted By To 2boymomHey, I checked into donating my eggs in return for getting my IVF expenses paid. In the contract I read, it said I had a choice (just as if I were placing my children that I'd given birth to for adoption) to have closed, semi-open or open adoption. I would choose and that would be put in the contract. Was yours like that? Did you choose, and was it put in the contract? She did send you their new address so apparently she isn't trying to hide from you. Maybe write her and let her know how you feel. If you would like to talk, feel free to email me at ONEXPLORER@aol.comGod Bless!

Originally Posted By 2boymomYes, we did have a contract. Visitation is all up to the parents. I can not contact them unless I move or if my children have a genetic disease that could affect their ED kids. I put in the contract those two specific reasons. If they find out their kid has a genetic disease or they move without telling me it is breaking our contract (however what I could do about it I don't know). She told me that she thought she would send me pictures after the babies were born. She knows how much I'd love to have a daughter of my own and how precious those pictures would be to me.I worry that her husband feels that I might try to take their kids. I made our contract iron clad. I don't want to take their kids (I can hardley afford my own two) and besides the kids are mine and her husbands, not mine and my husbands so I don't really see them as my kids. Also, they had asked me if I would mind if they kids ever wanted to meet me. I said sure. I imagine they will be curious about it their entire life (I would be) especially with the technology. It's kinda weird to have two moms and a dad. One biological mom and one that gives birth to you. And no, I'm not concerned at all about the kids health or welfare. I know the parents are great loving, doting parents and I'd never fear for them. I am just curious about them.Hugs, 2boymom

Originally Posted By 2boymomWe did not go though a clinic so we don't have the typical donor/receipent contract. I can not contact them. I imagine I wouldn't get into trouble for posting on one of the message boards she posts on (we both also have 3 year olds). Maybe that would be a way to be in contact with her. I don't think I could write her but I imagine both posting on the same message board she might be willing to contact me. I don't know. I don't regret helping them have their own kids. I don't mind not being in contact. I just wonder about them. I think that's probably normal. Even though they are not my kids, they are my kids. I was doing just fine til I discovered her on this bulletin board and now I can't stop thinking about them. Thats probably similar to a closed adoption. (Though I think a real adoption would be so much more difficult, my heart goes out to all you birth moms here)Hugs, 2boymom(Btw, best of luck with your IVF, the success rates get better each year. <smile> I know first hand.)

Originally Posted By To 2boymomHey, Maybe posting on the same board would help. It sure wouldn't hurt to try if that's what you want:)We are not going to have the IVF bc we don't have a clinic near us. We have 2 but they are about 3 hours away, and we would have to make the trip about every other day for a while. I just think that would really exhaust us, and break us too bc my husband would have to take off from work too much:( We are just going to keep trying to adopt:) Which we are both happy with:) God bless you! Please keep me updated on your situation. email: onexplorer@aol.comSharron